Randomness by Shay

CENSORED

2012-01-18T08:00:00.000-08:00

I'm going to jail?

2012-01-15T19:45:00.000-08:00

I hope not. If the Stop Online Piracy Act (HR 3261) or the Protect IP Act (S 968) pass, I could face up to 5 years in prison for this:

Last March, we thought Ronnie was so cute "whipping" his hair back and forth that we posted this video on Facebook. While we're paying attention to the cute kid, the entertainment industry and by-the-book judges will soon be paying attention to the song playing in the background. And, yes, I could go to jail for up to 5 years!

Not only that, but my favorite social networking sites, like facebook and pinterest, will be shut down in the process because there's no way they could effectively censor all of their users' content.

This Wednesday, Jan 18, I will be censoring this blog and shaybocks.com in protest of the bills and I have contacted my congressional representatives urging them to oppose this clear infringement on our first amendments rights. I'd love for you to get involved, too. Check out my latest post at shaybocks.com to find out what you can do!

Resolutions

2012-01-03T01:38:00.000-08:00

I was going to sit down and write up my new years resolutions and analyze how 2011 went, but then I realized that I love my life exactly how it is. I don't want to change a thing.

(This post was done on my phone since we don't have internet yet and this was the only pic I have on here. lol. Obviously a pic of both my boys would be more appropriate.)

Homeowners?

2011-12-29T10:00:00.000-08:00

One of the things Rob and I try to focus on is contentment. Of course, we want to eventually have everything we want, but for now we try to want everything we already have. Its hard and it takes a lot of work, but we've been relatively successful at it. We've now been home for over a year and it seems like every month we're here, someone is asking us when we're going to buy a house. We know we want to buy a house someday, but we also know that we're young with two small kids and we want to be out of debt, with a full emergency fund, 20% down payment, and the ability to afford a 15-year term mortgage payment without issue. That takes time while we work the program (Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University). We expected to be able to buy something within the next 5 years. But it looks like someone in high places had different plans for us.

You see, our lease was up months ago, but we haven't even really actively looked for another place to live. We just decided to live here month to month until things change. Yes, we hate walking up stairs to the third floor and space has definitely been an issue since Wade joined us, but the rent is low and we're generally happy here. Why change things?

Earlier this month, I received a call that would shake our world up in a split second. Turns out, 14 months ago when we first moved into this place, we were told we qualified to live in this income controlled apartment complex. After all, Rob was still officially in the army and we all know how little soldiers actually get paid. So we signed the lease, moved in, and considered ourselves lucky to find something so quickly - and at a steal compared to the average rent around here. It was obviously at the hand of God that things worked out so well. It would stand to reason that it would be at his hand that things would change just as quickly. The call I received was from the property manager at our complex and I almost dropped the phone when she informed me that they were auditing their files and it turned out that we never even qualified for an apartment, contrary to what we were told and approved for. She was supposed to give us 30 days to move, but since it's the holidays, she was generous and gave us 60 days instead. "Thank you for your generosity" certainly wasn't my first thought.

In general dramatic Shay fashion, I was devastated. What in the world were we going to do? I just spent so much money on Christmas presents! We don't have enough to move! What had I done that deserved such punishment? I should have went to church on Sunday! Why, oh why, did I stay home? After I got out of my own way, I realized that I wasn't being punished, just given an opportunity for change.

Rob and I sat down to discuss what we were going to do. I expected a conversation about finding a new apartment or searching for home rentals in the area, so I was pretty shocked when he said, "We're buying a house." What?! My penny pinchin' husband wants to buy a house? But, we're not ready! We still have the car payment and our emergency fund isn't fully stocked and what about a down payment? Ah, but things don't usually happen according to our plans, do they?

That very day, we met the perfect real estate agent, got pre-approved for far more than we were willing to pay on a house and started looking at listings. The first listing we saw, we loved, and made an offer. Unfortunately, our offer was lower than another, so we were denied and bummed. The very next listing was even nicer than the first and we made an offer on that one too. It was accepted and things got rolling rather quickly. They say the average home buying process, from contract to closing, takes anywhere from 1 to 6 months. After our closing on Dec. 30, it will have taken us 20 days to buy our home. With record-low (although artificial - end the FED!) interest rates, our mortgage payment will be lower than any rent we've seen around here - even for apartments. And with the VA loan we qualified for, there's relatively little we're paying up front. How did things work out so well? If we had known it would be this easy, we probably would have bought a house long ago. Looks like we just needed that push - a divine nudge?

There's something to be said for contentment, but when the time has come and you're backed into a corner, change is good. This weekend will be filled with painting and moving and new beginnings. The kids will actually have their own back yard to play in and their very own rooms. This minimalist family will have 1344 square feet of real estate to occupy - ah, breathing room? The house is coming with two LCD mounted TV's, so I foresee some movie watching in our future. Rob is thrilled he'll have a game room, and I'm pretty happy about my new stainless steel double-sided fridge.

If there's one thing we've learned as a family, it's that God is certainly in control and he's got it all figured out. Things don't happen when we think they will, and we're blessed beyond imagination when we decide to just hand over the reigns to the Almighty. We have lots to be thankful for in 2012 - what a way to end the year!

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

2011-12-23T04:45:00.000-08:00

This year our Christmas Card is a website and I'd love to share it with you!

Wishing you all the timeless treasures of Christmas - the warmth of home, the love of family, and the company of good friends.

How does today suck? Let me count the ways.

2011-12-13T17:08:00.000-08:00

Ronnie has a fever and he's cranky.
I broke a Christmas gift while trying to clean it after it got all messed up during shipping.
Paint from Ronnie's school clothes ruined an entire load of laundry. Money down the drain.
Wade won't stop crying because he's figured out how to stand up but then can't get back down.
I'm exhausted from waking up at 3am every morning trying to finish up a difficult project that probably won't get finished at all.
Mom! Mom! Mom! Mooom!
Texted husband about needing to sign papers with the real estate agent today after work. Never heard back. Ended up signing said papers by myself with two kids in tow. I still haven't seen or heard from the man. Luckily, I have the number to the Perdue control room, so at least I know he's working on a big repair.
Tried to put the box of tax paperwork back up in the closet when I lost my grip and two boxes and my jewelry box ended up all over the floor.
Brand new ink cartridge ran out of ink.
Typing this entire post smooshed between my two offspring like a turkey sandwich.

Thank you to my amazing real estate agent who promptly reminded me that today's the 13th and I can blame it on superstitious bad luck. Tomorrow will be better, but tonight I give up. Time to veg and watch bad tv.

What happened to October?

2011-11-16T21:00:00.001-08:00

Okay, we're well into the middle of November and I haven't even shared our Halloween craftiness yet. I've been working like a mad woman lately and between designing, child-rearing, thanksgiving supper planning, and Christmas shopping, time has slipped right out from under my nose. Well, no time for long explanations. Here's the short and dirty...

We made some Halloween treat bags for Ronnie's preschool class using this free printable. My computer decided the orange parts should be pink, so I shrugged my shoulders and said, "eh, we'll give those to the girls." It seemed to work out okay. Our goal for the treats inside was simple: no crap. Okay, the plastic flashlights and the frostie coupons could be considered crap, but at least there's no high-fructose corn syrup or red #40 in the bag.

We opted for the Trunk or Treat celebration at the church this year and the boys went as owls. How cute are they? I was so inspired by this tutorial I found on pinterest that I just had to recreate it. Of course, I don't sew, so I broke out the glue to put these bad boys together. With some linen and a mixture of felt and fleece, these actually turned out okay. We added these adorable crocheted owl hats by Amy K to finish off the look.

Stay tuned for more holiday fun! I've got lots of DIY projects in the works. :)

2011-09-27T04:29:00.000-07:00

www.blackthisout.com

Some Recent Realizations

2011-09-25T18:22:00.000-07:00

I am completely head-over-heels in love with my husband. Lately, it seems like we're on the same page about everything - from parenting philosophies to politics. He's become quite zen over the last few weeks and I LOVE it.
Ronnie started his new school year in preschool almost a month ago. And I totally forgot to share/post his first day pictures.
The baby turned 6 months old today. Oh crap. That one crept up on me.
No matter how hard I try, I'm never going to be as organized as I once was in high school. I need to stop trying every organization tool I can find, no matter how cool they look (like this, this, and this). Its just a waste of time, when I could be doing something productive.
We spend way too much money on food. My delusional estimate that our food budget is around $600 a month doesn't even cover half. Thanks to mint for enlightening me.
My days are flying by me and I don't know where the time goes. Even though I love designing, I really need to chill out, be present, and enjoy my children while they are still little.
I'm definitely voting for this guy. And I want every t-shirt, hoodie, and bumper sticker I can find to tell the world about him. Ron Paul, that is. He's not getting fair attention from the media because he's not backed by huge corporations. Hmmm... Its probably because he's looking out for Americans and not big business profit margins. I'm into him, among many reasons, because I've been pissed off for years regarding corporatism and its control of our government. Bottom lines influence everything we're allowed to do in this country when they shouldn't have any part of our choices. He's poling in the top three, but news stations barely even include him in the race discussions. I've decided to go blue republican and tell everyone I know to check him out on Youtube. He's worth the time to watch a few videos and get hooked.

Who needs sleep?

2011-09-08T05:46:00.000-07:00

Set my alarm for 9:30 last night to remind myself to go to bed. Head didn't hit the pillow until 4am. I've been that busy.

Found myself stuffing a chocolate chip muffin down my throat for breakfast at 6am. At least it was organic and gluten-free. As if that means anything for my waistline.

Dear Ronnie

2011-08-26T18:36:00.000-07:00

How did I get blessed with such a happy child? You are now 3 years, 4 months, and 19 days old. Currently, your favorite things are school, trains, Tangled (the movie), family, and coins (money).

Yesterday, you told me you were a man and that you had work to do. Wonder where you got that from? A couple of weeks ago, you told me that you wanted to be big and daddy to be small so you could go to work and get coins and buy a train set. Crazy how your logic works.

We started letting you do chores to earn quarters and put in a jar. Hopefully, you'll be able to buy a cool toy soon. Most of the time, you're pretty helpful and pick up the living room all by yourself while mama does the dishes.

You like lists. Ever since we started you on that morning routine for school, you totally get lists. You like it when you know what to expect. The other day, you asked me what our list was for the day. It was go get lunch, go to speech, go to the farmers market, then go home for cartoons and quiet time. You didn't argue a bit with any of it.

You rarely ever eat a meal anymore. You always ask for "snacks" so mama has to get creative and make sure you get your grow foods in. The best meal I can get you to eat is macaroni and cheese from Panera. That's your favorite place. Every time we're out in Greenbrier, you know it and ask to go to "era." I usually give in because you're too cute.

A couple of weeks ago you came home and told us that Logan is your best friend. That makes mama and daddy so happy! We love that you enjoy going to school, playing with your friends, and even making a best friend! You also told us that you like Kiley. A little early for girls, eh?

You absolutely adore your family! You can't get enough of them and really enjoy spending time with everyone. Every Sunday, you can't wait to get out of church so we can go over Memaw's house. Its always so much fun and you love to raid her cabinets looking for goodies.

You are an AWESOME big brother. There have been times when you heard Wade crying before I even did - that's how attentive you are. You're great at entertaining him. You can get a little rough at times, but you always know how to make your little brother laugh. About 50 times a day, I hear you saying, "I love you too Wade," and it puts a smile in my heart each and every time.

Dear Wade

2011-08-25T16:54:00.000-07:00

Little boy, you light up my world. Today, you're 5 months old. Most people think you're older, though. It might have something to do with the fact that you're wearing 12-18 month clothes. Yea, you're a chunk. But I love every bit of you.

Even though mama and daddy wanted to wait until you were 6 months old to feed you solids, you decided you were ready at 4.5 months. You screamed at me until I let you suck on my pear at lunch one day. So, I figured it was time to get some rice cereal. So far you like cereal, pears, apples, and bananas - all organic, of course. You're still a pro at breastfeeding, which makes mama very happy. You nurse about every 4 hours unless you're upset and want to nurse for comfort, which is okay by me. You still eat once or twice during the night, but I barely notice because we usually sleep right through it.

You're going to be a good listener, because you love it when people talk. You rarely interrupt a conversation because you're so interested in what we're saying.

You're an angry teether, just like your brother. We're able to manage with chamomile and lots of soft toys to chew on, but I know how stressful it is for you to be in so much pain. We better see a tooth soon - just sayin'.

So far, you can roll side to side and scoot a bit to reach a toy. You can grab your paci and attempt to put it in your mouth. You're successful some of the time. :) You like to change scenery often throughout the day, so you go from the bed to the high chair to mama's lap to the bouncy seat to a blanket on the floor - over and over again! We let you play in the play yard from time to time and you're starting to get used to it. Mama likes that you have a safe place to explore.

Your time with us so far has definitely made your mama and daddy realize how much we need to take a step back and focus on what's important. Even if it means going crazy thinking of everything that needs to get done when you just want me to lay in bed with you. These days are fleeting. You're already growing up too fast. I hope you stay this sweet forever.

Love,

Mama

I need your help!

2011-07-30T13:03:00.000-07:00

I'm having a hard time deciding on Ronnie's backpack for the fall. Which do you like best?

1 // 2 // 3 // 4

Our Simple Home: Ronnie's Room

2011-07-29T04:22:00.000-07:00

Ronnie's room is actually my favorite room of the house. This is the only room that has only things that we've purchased intentionally. Nothing is just thrown in here - it all belongs and it all has a purpose. He gets great sunlight in the morning!

I used to have a big bookshelf for Ronnie's books, but it was such a chore to keep it neat and tidy. Its so much quicker to throw all his books in the bin when I'm tidying up.

Ronnie has a few toys out where he can get to them, but most of his toys are kept in the top of the closet to minimize the mess. When he wants something down, he just asks us and then he has to clean it up before he gets something else. The free-reign toys are often scattered about his floor, though.

Our Simple Home: Kitchen

2011-07-27T05:00:00.000-07:00

The kitchen is the most logical place to start since this is where I spend most of my time. Let me first say that my kitchen is clean at least once a day - for about 5 minutes. For the other 1435 minutes of the day, I can't promise anything. I'll be the first to admit that my kitchen is butt ugly. But, I'm content with it. Its functional and has just enough space to prepare a healthy meal for my family. My goals in the kitchen are:

clear counter tops and appliances - I only have a microwave, a candle, and hand soap on the counters and just a small ikea plant on the fridge. I really prefer a clear fridge, but sometimes we show off Ronnie's latest painting on the front before it goes into his keepsake box.
only as many dishes as we need and use.
only as much food and pantry items as we need and use.
a clutter-free space.

Some of our dishes are missing from the cabinet here. We have 8 settings, but I hope to get us down to only a 4-setting set before the end of the year. Really, it only means I'll have to wash the dishes more. Also, the rest of our Klean Kanteens are missing because we use them all the time. You'll notice I save all kinds of jars. They are perfect for leftovers!

Just outside of the kitchen I have this shelf for our coffee pot, chips, bread, rags, and kid toys. I actually hate how you can see stuff sticking out of the top, but I'm living with it for now.

Our Simple Home

2011-07-26T05:00:00.000-07:00

I've noticed something about myself. Blogging is certainly therapeutic for me as a mom and homemaker. It helps me to stay on top of things and to constantly improve my processes and environment. I would seriously go crazy without this outlet. Over the past 2 years, I have dedicated myself to simplifying everything about my life. A true minimalist would look at my blog and laugh, because I'm nowhere near living out of a suitcase or picking up and traveling the world in an instant. But to me, that's not what my brand of minimalism is about - that's not even what I'm striving for. Its not a fad I'm into. Its something that's always been a part of me in some way but could never explain or put my finger on. Its simple. Simplicity is beautiful to me.

So, to help me get my home in order - to celebrate my progress and analyze what's still left to work on, I'm showing our home off to the world. Its nowhere near a magazine-worthy minimalist home with granite counter tops and shiny white floors. Its a humble apartment that houses me, my husband, and our two kids. It's our simple home.

A New Parenting Territory

2011-07-24T17:09:00.000-07:00

Since the moment Wade arrived, he's been my little side kick. We have never been more than a room or two apart, so its safe to assume that when its time for him to sleep, I'm right there with him. Most of the time I nurse him until he falls off and then we rock or just lay together until he drifts off to sleep.

About two weeks ago, a weird thing started happening. I noticed that if I needed to get up to go help Ronnie or answer the door, I would come back and he would be asleep. He had fallen asleep on his own without a peep! This was all new parenting territory for me since Ronnie had always cried himself to sleep. This happened a few more times before I decided it was time for me to try it out on purpose. I'd nurse him down and then give him his paci when he was done. Still wide awake, he'd lay there as I quietly left the room. The next thing I know, he's sleeping.

I was perplexed. How did he self-soothe so easily? Shouldn't he be "spoiled" since I have held him so much and have been there at his every beck and call since birth? And then I remembered why I have taken this approach in the first place.

For his entire life (all four months), he has never had to cry for more than a few minutes before I am at his side. I may not always be able to get him to stop crying, but I respond as quickly as possible. Yes, there have been moments when I seriously doubted my decision to do this because it was simply so exhausting. But a little prayer puts my woes at ease.

Since, as parents, we are our children's first representation of God, I decided to take my advice from the Good Book instead of well-meaning family, friends, and parenting manuals. In the Old Testament alone, scripture holds more than one hundred references to how people communicate with God through crying. Since a baby can't talk yet, crying is his only communication. A baby is communicating his needs with a parent just as we communicate our needs to God.

Psalm 34:17 says "The Lord hears his people when they call to him for help. He rescues them from all their troubles." Does God let us cry-it-out or is he there for us each and every time we cry out for help? I can't speak for others, but I know that God has always been there when I, God's child, needed him. So, why shouldn't I be there when my children need me?

Because I know that I am safe in the comfort of my Lord, I can rest at peace throughout the more difficult moments of my life. I know that if I need him and I cry out, the Lord will respond with compassion. Wade was able to self-soothe himself to sleep because he knows I am always nearby and if he should need me, I'll be there.

That miraculous Bible - it really is the ultimate manual for life, isn't it?

And The Thunder Rolls

2011-07-23T18:20:00.000-07:00

Today was a nasty hot day, so it stands to reason that the storm we got tonight would be an angry one. We had just put Ronnie to bed with his sippy cup full of chamomile tea and honey. I was laying in our bed with Wade as he slowly drifted off after a relaxing nursing session. All of a sudden, the sky lit up and BOOM! The loudest thunder I have ever heard! As soon as the noise subsided, a blood curdling scream came out of the room at the end of the hall. This is the first time a storm has ever scared Ronnie, so I ran as fast as I could to get to him and scooped him up into a tight hug. He cried, "I'm scared. I'm outta here!" His matter-of-factness gave me quite a chuckle. I brought him to bed with me and Rob sat with him for a minute to calm him and cover his ears for more thunder. I held his hand for a while and he looked over and said "I love you so much mommy." Its nights like this that remind me of how blessed I truly am.

My life isn't perfect. I fight with my husband, I lose my patience with the kids, we wonder how we're going to pay all the bills and save enough for a future, and often things don't go my way. But, I have the perfect family for me. Thanks to Him.

My 16 Favorite Baby Products

2011-07-20T22:07:00.000-07:00

I've written a lot about how babies come with a lot of stuff. My goal has been to acquire products that give me the most bang for my buck, so I can have less and still provide my baby with the healthiest options for his body and his earth. The products I have chosen have been the most beneficial to me so far and let me preface by saying that I certainly didn't pay full price for anything on this list - I could never afford that. Thanks to deal sites and discount codes, I've scored most of it for 50-70% off the list price. Here's my top 16:

Calendula Cream - [organic, sustainable, non-toxic, allergen-free, made in the USA] This stuff works miracles! So far we have used it on baby acne, rashes, scrapes, scratches, craddle cap, and bug bites. No need for any other special creams - its all in one!
Kate Quinn Organics - [organic, fair trade] My little fella is growing a lot faster than I ever expected, so I've had to update his wardrobe four times already! Thankfully, I snagged some fantastic deals on Kate Quinn Organics through various deal websites. I absolutely love how soft everything feels and it just gets softer and softer each time I wash it.
Kerchief Bib - [sustainable, non-toxic, made in the USA] This is actually the one item I haven't received yet, but I can't wait to try it out on my slobber-monster. FYI - Layla Grayce is terrible at order fulfillment.
Knotty Legs - [handmade in the USA] These adorable baby leggings have been helpful many a time already. They're perfect for keeping little legs warm without getting in the way of diaper changes. Not to mention, they're super stylish!
Wee Gallery Art Cards - [eco-friendly] While a 4-month old can barely hold a toy yet, Wade has been learning from these art cards since the day I brought him home. He loves to look at the black and white contrast and its a good eco-friendly option because they are printed with soy ink on 100% recycled card stock with food-grade lamination, so its safe for baby even if he ends up gnawing on a corner or two.
Moby Wrap - [organic, made responsibly in Thailand] The only negative thing I can say about my moby is that now that my baby is over 20 lbs, its hard to carry him in the front. We've tried the hip position, but he doesn't have enough strength to help hold himself up yet. We've shelved the moby for now, but will definitely take it out again soon. Wade LIVED in this thing the first 3 months of his life. I highly recommend it to every new mom.
Hyland's Homeopathic Chamomilla - [natural] This is a new addition to our favorites list because Wade just started teething a few weeks ago. He started having trouble sleeping at night from the pain, so I went on a search for a natural and safe solution with no side effects. Its kind of like how I give Ronnie chamomile tea before he goes to bed. Its soothes and it works. I've had to use them twice and both times it helped within a few minutes.
Under the Nile Sleeping Doll - [organic, fair trade, sustainable] We call this little guy Boo, 'cause I think he looks like a ghost. Wade loves to cuddle and gnaw on him. This company is also good for organic clothing and bedding, but we haven't tried them out yet.
Natural Wooden Teether by Little Sapling Toys- [sustainable, natural, non-toxic, made in the USA] So far, this is the toy that Wade can get the best grip on and he loves to chew on it. The products at Little Sapling Toys don't splinter and don't have chemicals in them for your baby to ingest.
Sophie the Giraffe - [natural, non-toxic, handmade in France] I think just about the whole world knows about this amazing little toy now. Wade loves to gnaw on her face!
Dream Blanket by Aden + Anais- [natural] This blanket is a dream! Its made of layers of natural muslin, so its super soft and warm, yet it still breathes. This is our go-to blanket for cuddle time.
Pura Stainless Steel Bottle - [non-toxic, lifetime warranty, made responsibly in china] I love love love this bottle! Not only is it cute, but its completely non-toxic and there's not one bit of plastic in it. A great feature is that it works with many different brands of nipples, so since Wade had taken to the Born Free bottles easily, I just use the BF nipples in my Pura bottle. I'm still exclusively breastfeeding, so we only have one bottle to put expressed milk in for when Wade needs it on Sunday mornings while he's in the nursery.
Primo Euro Bath - [non-toxic, made in the USA] At first, I loved my Puj tub, but Wade outgrew it sooner than I expected. After doing some searching, I finally decided on this one because its extra large, is molded to help keep baby safe in different positions, doesn't have any extra pieces, and can hang to dry. Wade seems to enjoy the freedom of taking a bath in this luxurious tub rather than cramped in the Puj.
Dr. Bronner's Castile Baby Soap - [organic, fair trade, recycled packaging, no animal testing] Although I could, I don't use this to wash the baby in the bath. I actually use it in my homemade cloth wipe solution. Put a few squirts of this in a cup full of water then add some grapeseed oil and a couple drops of tea tree oil and you've got the perfect solution to wipe the mess of your baby's bum!
American Apparel Organics - [organic, sustainable, made in the USA] I love the simple little onsies. A perfect green product for my eco-friendly baby.
Muslin Swaddles by Aden + Anais - [natural] Made of natural muslin, these soft and breathable blankets are perfect for swaddling, cuddling, and burping your baby. Although they make patterned swaddles, we prefer the simple white ones.

Same Shirt, Different Kid

2011-07-15T04:22:00.000-07:00

Seriously. I have given birth to a behemoth.

30 before 30

2011-07-09T19:01:00.000-07:00

Today I turned 26. It was an uneventful day. I cleaned the house, did three loads of laundry, played puzzles with Ronnie, cuddled with Wade, and watched a new documentary. And that's perfectly okay. Rob topped it all off by doing the dinner dishes and watching Source Code with me tonight while we enjoyed some blood orange sorbet.

Now that I'm on the "other side" of my twenties, I think a lot about where I thought I'd be in life as opposed to where I actually am at this point. Its nothing like I imagined. Let me try saying that a different way - I couldn't have possibly imagined something more perfect. I am blessed. And this birthday is just a little kick in the butt to remind me.

There's nothing wrong with looking forward, though. And that's exactly what I've been doing for the past couple of weeks. I've compiled a little list of the 30 things I'd like to do before I turn 30 - only 4 years away! Maybe I won't complete them all, but who says I can't try?

Become a vegetarian.
Successfully grow at least one edible vegetable.
Scream "WE'RE DEBT FREE!"
Make enough to support my family so Rob can go back to school.
Buy or build a home.
Take my kids to Disney World.
Rent a cottage in Nags Head for a week.
Pay for someone’s meal behind me in a drive through.
Buy myself something nice from Tiffany & Co.
Go vegan for 30 days.
Start composting.
Try accupuncture.
Go on a cruise.
Attend a blogger conference. (I'm not necessarily a blogger, but my clients are)
Go camping with my family.
Build or refinish something.
Buy (or acquire) a dSLR camera and learn how to use it.
Join a CSA.
Take a family bike ride.
Complete a No-Spend Month.
Host a holiday meal.
Bake my own bread.
Completey unplug for a week.
Summer in the Hamptons.
Go sailing.
See the horses at Corolla Beach.
Learn how to use Illustrator like the pros.
Chill at a bonfire.
Get a facial.
Save up for and buy a california king sized bed… we need it.

Consumption Report: Areas That Need Improvement

2011-06-29T17:09:00.000-07:00

I recently discussed our successes so far in the war against consumption, but now its time to battle what still needs some improvement. I've got six months left to do as much as I can to consume less and live more - and its going to take some work on my part. Serious work.

Stop eating fast food: I really really really need to ban fast food for us. Not only is it completely unhealthy and completely against everything I believe in, its a major source of trash! But, its so much easier to swing in to a drive-through than to remember to pack lunches. I can give myself a little credit because I have tried to choose options like Panera lately. Its much healthier than a (not-so) happy meal and they use real dishes - no plastic and paper stuff to throw away. Jason's Deli has been another great option for us on days we have Speech Therapy - its inevitable that we always need to grab something quick on the way.

Change up my beauty routine. Okay, I tried to go no-poo, but it didn't work for me. At all. I've been trying out some natural and organic products lately, but there's still all that packaging. I'd like to find a shop around here that has bulk shampoos and soaps so I can fill up in a glass jar as I need it. If you know of one in the Hampton Roads area, please let me know!
Go paperless: I'm down to one bankers box (for taxes and army stuff) and one little file folder box (bills, medical, legal, etc). Let's see if I can pare that down a little more before the end of the year.
Grow my own food: So far, this is a big fat failure. I tried to keep a parsley plant alive but it didn't last three days. Maybe I should take a gardening class or something.
Shop less. I can admit that I have a slight shopping problem. I try and justify it with a good old Bible verse - "She shops around for the best yarns and cottons" Proverbs 31:13. A virtuous woman shops around for the best products for her family, right? Even if I have the best of intentions, I certainly get the fact that if I shopped less, I'd save my family plenty of money and space. Its hard for a mom who wants her kids to have neat stuff, though. But, its just stuff. I need to remember that. I thought that by not allowing myself in the stores and shopping online instead, it would keep me from buying too much. But then along came the deal sites. Oh, those sweet sweet deal sites. Oh, its a deal. And well worth the money. But I probably buy too much.
Eliminate the trash: Okay, even with all the work I've done, we still fill an entire trash bag almost DAILY. Its still my goal to get down to one trash bag a week, so I may have to do a trash inventory soon to see where its all coming from.

Got any suggestions for me? I'd love to see what you think in the comments!

Consumption Report: Successes

2011-06-28T18:39:00.000-07:00

At the beginning of this year, I declared war on consumption in the Bocks household and we're now six months into our mission. I guess its time to check in. To start off, I'd rather talk about our successes first and address what we need to work on later. I still have half a year to get there, though, so let's talk about what's worked so far.

Buy local produce: Now that the farmer's markets have opened up for the season, I've really enjoyed taking a weekly trip to pick up some fresh produce. I even bring my own produce bags so there's zero waste involved.
Eliminate the trash: I'm far from complete on this one, but I have made great strides to get there.

I finally found a natural market here that has bulk bins for rice, pasta, snacks, grains, etc. I bring my own glass jars, get them weighed before filling them, and then pick out what I want. This actually turns out quite a bit cheaper. I get healthier options, and it's zero-waste! My favorite things are the quinoa pasta, all-natural m&m's, and the goji berries! This is our pantry - there's still quite a bit of packaging there, but its much better than how we started out.

Milk cartons were taking up a lot of our trash space, so when I found out that I could get fresh milk and lemonade delivered in glass jars, I jumped on it. The glass jars go back to the dairy to be cleaned and refilled. While this milk isn't certified organic like our preferred Horizon milk, they use humane organic practices on their family farms. I comfortable with that - and it costs about a buck less per half-gallon - with zero-waste! I also get some cage-free antibiotic and hormone-free eggs delivered as well.

We've almost ditched the revolving supply of ziploc bags and plastic bowls. I love using my glass bowls with silicone lids to store leftovers in. :) Fossil-fuel free and nothing to throw away (so I get to say zero-waste again!).

Ronnie's snacks have been a major source of trash for us around here, but I've been working on finding ways to avoid any trash at all. Look! A zero-waste snack pack for school (and no plastic involved either) - filtered water in a stainless steel bottle, sesame sticks, natural m&m's, goji berries, dried apples, and a cheese wheel.

Let's talk about diapers. I still LOVE my cloth dipes. I still use chlorine-free disposables for our day-trips away from home, but I try and use the cloth diapers as much as I can. I even worked up the nerve to add cloth wipes to our routine. I've had them prepared since before Wade was born, but I neglected to use them for a while. Once I added a mixture of filtered water, Dr. Bronner's organic baby wash, tea tree oil, and grapeseed oil to my homemade wipes, I was in love. These wipes work so much better than disposables and it also means less trash to throw away. These babies go right in with the dirty diapers. Zero-waste wins again!

Stop buying ziploc bags: While I haven't stopped completely, I have really been focusing on using reusable bags for snacks, sandwiches, and such. Rob didn't like it when I put a reusable bag in his lunch, though, so I've had to keep the ziplocs for him - I've managed to make the boxes last forever by really using them sparingly.
Use washable shopping bags: I absolutely adore my flip & tumble bags. They've been through the washer dozens of times and they still look brand new. No more throwing away the polypropylene bags! :)
Explore new ways to eliminate cleaning products from my cabinets: workin' on it. Here's what my cleaning shelf looks like right now:

I tried making my own laundry detergent and it worked well for a while - until it started to build up in the cloth diapers and made them stink to high heavens. So, I had to switch to Country Save, which is a natural detergent that leaves no build-up. It works great and comes in a cardboard box that I can recycle, so I can't really complain with that.

Instead of fabric softener dryer sheets, I have discovered these wool dryer balls that cut down on drying time and soften at the same time. I even add a couple drops of essential oil to each ball about once a week to make our clothes smell super fresh!

And, as you can see, I'm still using vinegar, baking soda, and peroxide for most of my cleaning needs. I found this cool air freshener and all-purpose cleaner to use when I want some smelly-good stuff, but that's far from zero-waste. I suppose at least I can re-use or recycle the bottles, so its not all that bad.

Buy USA made products: I can count on my hands the number of times I've shopped in a Wal-mart this past year. I've been that good about it. While I've had dozens of opportunities to choose USA made over foreign products, here's a couple of examples:

When it came time to buy Ronnie a twin-sized bed, we chose this simple wood USA-made frame. Granted, the mattresses are from IKEA, but they were the cheapest "safer" mattress option around.

And when I needed Easter presents for the kiddos this year, I opted for homemade cloth baskets, a wooden bowling set, and a wooden teether from homegrown etsy shops. Notice the absence of Easter "grass"? I figured it was a needless waste of plastic or paper, so I just left it out.

Stay tuned to find out what I still need to work on!

Preschool?

2011-06-27T05:05:00.000-07:00

Today was Ronnie's first day of school - Preschool Summer Camp! This feels a little weird. Okay, a lot weird. My itty bitty 6lb 12oz baby is now a preschooler. I've known for a while that Ronnie has needed that extra stimulation, interaction with other kids, and a good educational outlet. Now that he's completely potty trained, he gets to do stuff like this. I am so happy for him!

Rob and I started out our day at 5:30am to get ourselves ready before we got up our little guy. He actually didn't want to get out of bed and it took him a few minutes of cuddling with dad before he'd sit at the table for his breakfast. And then, of course, he didn't even eat it. I think we'll have to get up even earlier tomorrow. Once we started on our morning routine, though, it was smooth sailing.

The Little Princess

2011-06-26T13:45:00.000-07:00

[source]

Once upon a time, there lived a little princess in a quaint little castle on the edge of a quaint little town. The little princess had a humble assortment of friends whom she loved with all her heart. She enjoyed being with these friends because she knew she could always be genuine with them. They all loved to play happy games, enjoyed great feasts, and sang joyfully in church.

One day, the little princess married her prince, who whisked her away to a far off land. While happy with her prince, the little princess missed her friends in the quaint little castle on the edge of the quaint little town. One day, her prince announced that he would travel to the other side of the world to conquer new lands. The little princess quickly became sad and lonely. But soon she discovered other princesses in the far off land and they began to keep each other company. They all missed their princes and appreciated having others who could understand them. But the little princess still missed her friends in the quaint little castle on the edge of the quaint little town.

When her prince returned, everyone celebrated and the little princess smiled from ear to ear. When he explained that they would be going back to the quaint little castle on the edge of the quaint little town, the little princess was even happier! She longed to see her friends again - to play games and enjoy great feasts and sing joyfully in church.

The little princess and her prince traveled many a day and night to return home to their quaint little castle on the edge of the quaint little town. The little princess called upon her companions as soon as she arrived. Her heart was so happy. But soon, that happiness faded away. See, her friends no longer liked to play happy games and enjoy great feasts and sing joyfully at church. They had changed. They made new friends and were happy to enjoy a pint in the tavern or hunt in the deep dark forest instead.

The little princess tried to fit in for a while, but she never felt quite right. She wasn't being genuine anymore and so she couldn't be happy. Pretty soon, her friends no longer wanted the little princess around and so she quickly became sad and lonely.

Not much of a fairy tale, huh?

Randomness 05.31.11

2011-05-31T19:28:00.000-07:00

These days, I don't have enough focus to actually sit down and write an eloquent account of recent days. I've got that terrible mom syndrome where I go to the kitchen for a cup of water and end up changing the laundry, a diaper, feed the baby, check my email, make a template edit, and unclog the sink again before I finally remember to grab a cup and put some ice in it. The genius invention of facebook has been helping me to regurgitate my day in short spurts - micro-blogging is certainly more of my thing these days. But, I don't want to neglect my precious blog over here, so another Randomness post it is!

Being an entrepreneur and stay-at-home mom to two babies while my husband works ungodly hours and goes to school has absolutely forced me to be stronger than I think I am. While I do love the sense of accomplishment (that others may not see, but I do) and I wouldn't trade this opportunity to live each and every moment with my boys, I dream of the days when the kids are in school, Rob is out of school and working a cake engineering job 9 to 5, and I will have more brain power and time to pursue my passions whole-heartedly. I honestly don't think I can even imagine what I'll be able to achieve then - its that good in my head.

Ronnie is 98% potty trained. Yipee! Today, he had to use a public restroom 3 times because we were gone all flippin' day - and he didn't have one single accident. He loves boxers, but won't touch those tighty whities - even with Buzz Lightyear on them. This means he can start preschool! I plan to enroll him sometime this week and he'll start at the end of June. I think it will be a fantastic opportunity for him to interact with other kids, work on his speech skills, and follow directions for a change (kiddin'!).

Wade had his 2-month checkup today. Our little chunk weighs 15lbs 14oz now. He's HUGE! That's in the 98th percentile for his age. And I'm still completely breastfeeding him - no formula supplement at all. At my 6-week postpartum checkup, my midwife said I should bottle the stuff and sell it. She was quite impressed at how "healthy" he is. He's certainly thriving. He may weigh a lot, but its all in proportion. He's in the 90th percentile for his height and 95th for his head circumference. He's got something big in store for his future. I just know it!

Ronnie rode his first roller coaster a couple of weeks ago at Busch Gardens. Okay, so it was a kid roller coaster, but it went up and down and even sideways. I was a nervous wreck, but he enjoyed it so much that he waited in line for a second ride. That's my cutie sitting next to the handsome fella with the shades pointing at the camera.

I have changed my work routine so that I work in the morning now, rather than at night. Its so much easier just to get up with Rob at 6:00 and get things done while I'm fresh and the kids are still sleeping (more often than not, Wade is with me in the Moby wrap). Before, I worked at night once the kids were in bed. But, I was always tired myself after a hectic day and I would end up working till the wee hours of the morning - making me even more tired the next day. And the cycle continues. This new arrangement works so much better for me.

These green smoothies have been keeping me going. I've wanted to try it out for years, but never was brave enough until recently. Even with breastfeeding, I'm not losing weight anymore (after I dropped 25 pounds the first week after delivery). I thought maybe this would help me out, but no such luck yet. Even if it isn't making me lose weight though, these things are around to stay. They are quite yummy! My favorite is apple, mango, spinach, strawberry, cherry, agave nectar, and almond milk. That sounds like a lot of fruit, but about half of the smoothie is actually spinach. Yum!

The summer bugs are here, so I've gone on a cleaning binge. It really grosses me out to see bugs in our living space - especially with the kiddos. So far, we've had ants, 1 roach, and a crazy influx of flies. Not sure where they are coming from, but I've had to break out some kung-fu-bug-killing-skills. I've decided to get rid of half our crap again. Not kidding in the least. I just took a whole car-load of stuff to the donation bin and I've got a bit more to go tomorrow. I can also finally get rid of the TA-50 gear, since its been 6 months since Rob's ETS. Yay! I'm hoping to take some pics of our new cleaned out spaces once everything is gone. :)

I have a confession. I'm totally addicted to all of these one-day deal sites that are popping up everywhere. Seriously - good stuff cheap - but it means I'm buying much more than I normally would. Like this adorable organic kimono onsie. Cute and cost less than I would spend on an outfit at Babies-R-Us. I already bought the kids first stocking stuffer for Christmas - Tegu blocks 60% off. Where is the line between being a mom who is creatively working with a budget and over-consumption? I don't know yet. I do know that I haven't bought anything yet that I had second thoughts about or regretted. At least I'm intentional about what I've chosen to purchase. And usually, these purchases can take the place of something I would have already bought (like new clothes for a little boy who is growing faster than expected). And most of it is not made in China - ultra plus.

We spent Memorial Day at the beach. It took a lot of convincing to get Rob to drive down there on his rare day off, but I pulled it off. I absolutely love how being in the Outerbanks pulls some kind of drive out of me. It reminds me about what I want out of life - the ability to sit back, relax, and soak up the peacefulness. Every time we're down there, Rob and I DREAM together. And that's special.

In Harmony

2011-05-25T03:42:00.000-07:00

The other day, during a phone conversation with my mother-in-law, I mentioned that Wade was having a hard time napping because every time he'd get to sleep, Ronnie would come up singing or playing a guitar or running loudly and wake the baby. Her response was, "Well, maybe he'll sleep good tonight." That's a pretty well-meaning and common phrase - I guess because babies are known to keep parents up throughout the night, causing sleep deprivation and such. But it made me think. So far in the last two months, I've never once had a problem with Wade keeping me up at night. He's never had a crying marathon or refused to go to bed. Hmm... I must be in harmony with my baby.

Ronnie, my first child, kept me up many a night. I was extremely sleep deprived while caring for him - while my husband was deployed and my family was a few states away. But he was my first. I didn't really know what I was doing. I thought I did. But I didn't.

When Ronnie was almost a year old, I was introduced to the idea of attachment parenting. I didn't do much research into the idea at first, so from the few tidbits I did know, I thought it was a great idea but something that wasn't really realistic. Plus, it went against everything I'd grown up knowing about how kids should be raised. Little by little, I came to know more about the idea and realized that this style of child rearing was definitely more in line with how I felt intuitively about my mothering style. It's parenting by God's design and therefore is pretty instinctual. Society's pressures about how we should raise our children gets in the way of that instinct and we end up with something totally different, though.

Now, there are some crazies out there that take this idea of attachment/gentle/natural parenting to an extreme. I've seen and heard of some pretty interesting stuff that I probably wouldn't do with my kids. But, of course, every family should take its own path. My kids still have boundaries and rules - they in no way "rule the roost." What we're doing right now works for us - and I hope to keep it that way.

In order to stay in harmony with my baby, I follow the 7 Baby B's:

Birth Bonding: Having a natural child birth was the first step to ensuring a good attachment foundation. Because there weren't any artificial hormones, anesthetics, or narcotics involved, the natural bonding process was allowed to take place. It was absolutely hard and I almost gave up, but with a natural oxytocin surge, my body actually fell in love with my baby and my baby fell in love with me. Wade latched on and nursed right away which set us up for a very successful breastfeeding relationship. That brings us to...
Breastfeeding: When I'm feeding my baby, we are actually physically attached. Breastfeeding doesn't just give him the best nutritional start in life, it also ensures that my hormones are in check. I'm able to remain calmer, happier, and more able to read my baby's cues.
Babywearing: Babies want to be held. God designed them that way in order to ensure their survival and when a baby is physically close to a parent, he thrives. I wear Wade in our moby wrap a lot throughout the day. As soon as I wake up and get dressed, I put my wrap on. He sits in it while I work at my computer or while I'm up around the house doing things. Its not often that you'll see him in the stroller or carrier when we're out. I get out of the car and he goes right in the wrap. He loves it. I think this is when he's most comfortable and he often sleeps right through things (like church and a trip to Busch Gardens) when he's so close to me.
Bedding Close to Baby: I know some people think its crazy (or dangerous) that we sleep with our kids. But, when certain guidelines are followed, it can be one of the best things. Some precautions we take include never letting both of them sleep with us at the same time and putting the baby between mom and the side of the bed with a guard rail. I never take sleeping medicine or drink, so my alertness is never compromised. A breastfeeding mother is hard-wired to continue caring for her child even when she's sleeping, so Wade is never in danger. This also allows for easy feedings throughout the night. I don't have to get up to go get the baby and nurse him. I just help him to latch on and then lay there while he eats. Sleeping with our little ones actually gives us joy. Its such a precious moment to wake up to a smiling baby. Since Ronnie can't sleep with us anymore (not safe with the baby), we sometimes put his toddler mattress at the end of our bed and let him sleep there. That way he's still close to us. But, usually, he's pretty good at sleeping in his own bed at night now.
Belief in the Language Value of Your Baby's Cry: Boy, oh boy, this is a big one. I always thought it was healthy for a baby to cry. In fact, I used to let Ronnie to cry-it-out at bedtime when I didn't let him sleep with me. I realize now that crying is always communication by the baby. I have never let Wade cry or fuss for more than a few minutes at a time because I know that he's always trying to express a need. And his needs might not only be that he needs to be changed or feed. He could just need to be held or assured that I'm close. Because we're in harmony, I'm often able to just look him in the eye and let him know that I'm there to get him to stop crying.
Beware of Baby Trainers: Everyone has a piece of advice. Because we're confident in the parenting style that we've chosen and we know that its okay to follow our instincts, most advice doesn't phase us. Everyone has and should take their own path.
Balance: Although I haven't felt any need to "get away" yet, I did get a little overwhelmed at one point. Keeping my cool with both kids proved to be challenging one day and I needed something to give. I ended up buying a baby swing to soothe Wade for a few minutes at a time while I dealt with Ronnie when I needed to. It helped. At first, I felt guilty because I didn't want to loose the close bond that Wade and I have. I didn't want him to feel abandoned by me and just stuck in a swing to entertain himself. But, he enjoyed it. And I had a free moment to read stories or change over the laundry or make dinner. Its all about balance!

Flyin' Dreams

2011-04-09T11:12:00.001-07:00

Last night, I dreamed I was swimming in the water and flying through the air with ease. Those are my favorite. I must be pretty darn happy.

our first week

2011-03-31T08:16:00.000-07:00

4 days old

Today, Wade is 6 days old! I can't believe its been almost a week already. Here's some highlights of the past few days:

Right when we were supposed to leave the hospital, we found out that Wade had tongue tie. So, we had to wait the entire day for a plastic surgeon to come in and clip it. We were actually really scared for him - we didn't want to put him through any more pain! But he didn't even cry. Came right back in the room and nursed right away. I think it was probably a relief for him and I was hopeful that the nursing pain would go away and my nipples could heal. A few days later, I'm still experiencing some pain issues. I got a hold of the local La Leche League and they gave me some tongue exercises to do with him. My sister is also going to pick up a pump from a lactation specialist today. I can't wait to get it and relieve some of this engorgement, which is only making latching on harder.

Even though nursing has been a challenge for me, Wade is a pro at it. Take a look at yesterday alone:

10:54 pm	Finished Nursing right (0:21)
10:32 pm	Started Nursing right	null
10:28 pm	Finished Nursing left (0:08)
10:20 pm	Started Nursing left	null
10:17 pm	Pee and Poop
8:46 pm	Finished Nursing right (0:14)
8:32 pm	Started Nursing right	null
8:26 pm	Pee and Poop
8:08 pm	Finished Nursing left (0:09)
8:00 pm	Vitamin D (0 dose)
7:58 pm	Started Nursing left	null
7:58 pm	Finished Nursing right (0:24)
7:34 pm	Started Nursing right	null
7:26 pm	Pee and Poop
6:28 pm	Finished Nursing left (0:22)
6:04 pm	Started Nursing left	null
5:00 pm	Pee and Poop
4:12 pm	Finished Nursing left (0:08)
4:03 pm	Started Nursing left	null
3:58 pm	Finished Nursing right (0:18)
3:39 pm	Pee and Poop
3:39 pm	Started Nursing right	null
3:32 pm	Pee
1:42 pm	Finished Nursing left (0:11)
1:31 pm	Started Nursing left	null
1:28 pm	Pee and Poop
11:16 am	Finished Nursing right (0:15)
11:00 am	Started Nursing right	null
10:44 am	Pee and Poop
9:11 am	Finished Nursing left (0:21)
8:50 am	Started Nursing left	null
8:47 am	Pee
7:03 am	Finished Nursing right (0:06)
6:56 am	Started Nursing right	null
6:50 am	Pee and Poop
5:57 am	Finished Nursing left (0:06)
5:50 am	Started Nursing left	null
5:50 am	Finished Nursing right (0:07)
5:41 am	Started Nursing right	null
5:39 am	Pee and Poop
2:56 am	Finished Nursing left (0:08)
2:40 am	Started Nursing left	null
2:37 am	Finished Nursing left (0:05)
2:32 am	Started Nursing left	null
2:30 am	Pee and Poop
2:05 am	Finished Nursing right (0:17)
1:48 am	Started Nursing right	null
1:45 am	Pee

That's 17 nursing sessions and 13 diaper changes - more than double the guideline for determining if your baby is getting enough. Now, if we can just get a proper latch and relieve the pain, we'll be home-free. If you're wondering how I kept track of all that, check out Baby ESP for android. Its very convenient to keep a record right my phone - and its super simple to use. One finger to touch start and it keeps track for me.

We gave Wade his first bath at home and he didn't even fuss very much. Just a couple icky faces, but no crying until we laid him on the hard counter.
Speaking of crying, he doesn't cry that much at all. We're able to anticipate his needs pretty well and we follow his cues, so he doesn't need to cry. Its very peaceful. Wearing him in the moby wrap helps him to remain calm and do things with us (like eating supper as a family last night). Sleeping with him in the bed or in the co-sleeper makes night feedings less daunting than I remember. I wish I had felt comfortable enough with my parenting style when Ronnie was a newborn. Things could have been so much easier!

He's a porker

2011-03-26T19:40:00.000-07:00

I am so happy to finally announce the birth of Wade Lee Bocks, born on Friday, March 25, 2011 at 8:44am. He weighed in at 9 pounds and was 20.5 inches long! Thankfully, I was able to deliver him completely au naturale.

It certainly wasn't as easy as I had expected. The labor lasted a total of 19 hours and started just after a lunch date with my sister, Tiffanny, at Buffalo Wild Wings. I had the buffalo chicken ranch wrap. Yum. A friend of mine, who happened to deliver her daughter last week, told me that a trip to this particular restaurant put her in labor with both of her kids. I figured since I had tried everything else, I might as well give it a shot. Tiffanny swiped one of the cups with the BWW logo on it just in case it worked and we wanted it for memories. It totally worked. Within 30 minutes, I was having light contractions while browsing Old Navy for some new jeans for Rob. I called my mom all giddy asking her if she thought it could work that fast. After getting home, Ronnie and I were able to lay down for a nap and thank goodness we did. I had no idea how much energy I would need through the night.

When Rob got home from work at 7:30, I was feeling the contractions more definitively and they were coming a lot closer together. We sat down to have supper and then played with Ronnie a while before I decided it was time to start taking things seriously. Rob got Ronnie set up in the bedroom with a movie and downloaded a contraction timing application on my phone. I hopped in the shower and starting yelling out "start" and "stop" with each contraction. We came to the conclusion that they were about 4 minutes apart and lasting longer than a minute, so a call to the midwife I made. I totally thought she'd say to try resting or walking around and to call her back when things got more intense, but she didn't. She actually advised me to head to the hospital and she'd let them know that we were on the way. Could this really be it?

When we got out to the car, I sat there and prayed that God would let this really be it. I didn't want a false alarm. I wanted it to be real. I asked God for his help and I talked to Wade asking him to please cooperate and let this happen.

We dropped Ronnie off at Rob's mom's house and off to the hospital we went. After finally finding the emergency room entrance (since this was about 10:00pm), we got checked in and they whisked us off to the birth center. I was doing fine up until the lady asked me for my insurance card right in the middle of a contraction. I pre-registered, so I didn't expect to deal with any of that. Tears rolled and I think they got the picture because it wasn't long before I was in my room changing into my night gown.

Mom and Dad were already there when we arrived, so they came up to the room and sat with us while they monitored the baby's heart rate and my contractions for a while. Sure enough, they were three minutes apart and REAL. It wasn't in my head. This was really happening. So, the nurse checked my cervix and you'll never guess what number came out of her mouth. I expected a big number - something in the middle maybe. The contractions I was feeling were far more painful than anything I felt at 6cm with my first delivery. Keep in mind that I had already been in labor for 9.5 hours. She looked right at me with a smile and said, "okay, 1cm." WHAT??!?! ONE FREAKIN' CENTIMETER!?! You have got to be kidding me. My dilation hadn't changed since 2 weeks ago. What the heck? I decided that Mom and Dad should go home. Rob went to sleep and I paced the room trying to speed things up on my own. An hour later I was at 2cm and two hours after that I was at 3cm. Things were really going slow.

A little before 7:00am, my midwife came in and broke my water. At that point, I was only at 4cm dilation. She warned me that because of my Group B strep, I would have to progress before 10:00am or else they would have to induce with pitocin. Oh no! That was what I was trying to avoid! It wasn't looking good, but as soon as she left the room the contractions got intense. And I mean INTENSE. I was bent over the bed, in the shower hunched over the birthing ball, squatting, walking, leaning over the bathroom counter, on the toilet, swaying on the birthing ball by the bed, all over the place! Rob was there to put pressure on my lower back and hips and it helped to lean my bottom into him. I'm sure it looked kinda freaky, but it helped. Finally, I had reached my breaking point. I was in the shower on my knees hunched over the birthing ball with a Yummy Earth Organic lollipop in my mouth and screaming obscenities through the pain. I was trying to remember to breathe, but it wasn't easy. I told Rob to go tell them I want to be checked NOW. I needed to hear that I had made progress because I was about to give up.

She checked me again and, finally, there was progress. She said 6-7cm and I had a slight moment of belief that I could do this. That is, until the next contraction. The nurse was trying to get the baby's heartbeat, but I couldn't stay still. I was in so much pain. It took 3 more contractions to get the heartbeat and I somehow ended up on my hands and knees on the bed trying to deal with each rush while she held the little do-hickey on my belly. After she was done with me, I reached up and grabbed onto the bars behind the bed and leaned into each contraction on my knees. Rob tried to help me at this point, but it no longer felt good to be rubbed and pushed. I screamed. Screamed harder than I ever have in my life.

This is the part where I almost gave up. When he could no longer help me, I asked Rob to go find out if there's anything they could put in my IV that wasn't a narcotic. He went out and asked but she said all they could do is an epidural. I sat for a second to decide if I'd rather have the awful feeling of no-control with an epidural or the pain of these contractions. My next contraction made that decision for me. I remember saying "Please help me." She asked me if I wanted the epidural and I said "Yes!" Rob took a moment to remind me that I asked him not to let me get it. I felt awful. I didn't want it, but I didn't think I could take the pain. I thought I was dying. The nurse informed me that she would get my IV ready for fluids so they could put the epidural in. On my next contraction, I screamed in pain and then all of a sudden felt the urge to push. I thought it was too early, but I yelled out "I want to PUUUUUSH!!!" and with that I pushed with all my might. Someone came in and checked me - 9cm and the head was right there. I didn't even need to go the entire 10.

Sometime during this, Rob's boss called him to ask where he should send flowers. LOL! And I'm screaming, "OH MY GOD!" in the background. Rob hung up and came back in the room. He saw the midwife getting her stuff ready and asked if she was doing the epidural. She replied, "Epidural? No, honey. We're having a baby."

After I realized that I wasn't getting the epidural, I screamed many curse words. I rarely curse (esp. the F-bomb), so I felt bad for doing it even as I was saying them. And all in the same breath, I shouted "God, please help me. Please help me do this. God, I need your help." Over and over. I was sincere. I really needed His help. I could NOT do it alone.

With the next contraction, I pushed his head out. This all happened in a matter of seconds. The pain got even more intense as I had a super-long contraction. I was screaming and writhing around while still on my knees on the back of the bed holding those bars. Thank goodness for Ina May Gaskin, who's books let me know that whatever position felt right was the correct position to be in. Ironically, the baby had shoulder dystocia, a rare labor condition that usually requires many maneuvers to successfully deliver, including the Gaskin Maneuver of a hands and knees position. There were a few seconds of panic when they realized he was stuck. "Shay, you HAVE to push your baby out RIGHT now." I was trying, but I was having a hard time bearing down enough. The emergency button was pushed and the room was instantly flooded with every nurse and midwife on hand. Before they could even try to reposition me, I pushed and felt the baby slide out of me. It was warm and it was such a relief! At this point, I'm still on the back of the bed, so I can't see anything. I hear, "There's the baby. Oops, the cord just fell out." Blood everywhere and he wasn't crying yet.

I looked over my shoulder and saw him on the table. They were checking him out, for obvious reasons and I was so worried that I had hurt him. Again, another prayer, "God, please help him. Please help him. Let him be okay." And then he cried. What a sweet sound!

They got me turned around so I could deliver the placenta. There I am, buck-naked, exhausted in a room full of worried medical staff and I've still got to deliver that damn placenta. During this time, they've called the pediatrician to come down and check the baby. I guess they were concerned about his collar bone. Everything checked out fine.

As soon as I was completely done with delivery and two stitches (without anesthesia, I might add), they handed me my precious sweet baby boy and I put him right to my chest. Without any hesitation, he got a hold of my breast and started nursing. Just like the books told me he would! I couldn't believe it. This porker nursed for a whole hour before going off to the nursery with his daddy.

I got cleaned up, set up in my room, and walked down to the nursery to check on everything. He was still getting his hearing test, so we sat in there for a while waiting for things to finish up. The nurse said they weighed him 3 times because they didn't believe how big he was - 9 pounds! And I delivered that - with shoulder dystocia. Seriously. I feel like wonder woman right now.

The past couple of days have been amazing - to hold my sweet precious baby boy. But, I'm ready to go home now and spend some time as a family. I miss Ronnie so much. Thankfully, his MawMaw has been so amazing with him and he's having a blast. He's been up here to see us twice and its such a perfect moment when he leans over to kiss his baby brother.

Words can not express how grateful I am to have experienced the uncountable miracles of my life and this experience can just get added to the pile. God is in control. That, I know, is certain.

40 Weeks!?!?

2011-03-24T04:24:00.000-07:00

So, I'm still pregnant. Yes, my due date was Tuesday. To pass the time, I figured I'd put together a collage of my bad bathroom belly pics:

And those bottom pictures are me on my due date - at 40 WEEKS! I started having prodromal (fake) labor over a month ago, so I thought for sure this kid would be born by now. At my 38 week check up, I was only dilated to 1cm. It was reassuring to find out that I was progressing and I was up to 2cm by my 39th week. Unfortunately for me, at 40 weeks I'm back down to only 1cm. I asked her to strip my membranes at my appointment yesterday, but she said she couldn't even get a finger in there to do it. That's when the tears started. It became apparent that my dream of experiencing a completely natural birth probably won't come true.

They had me do a non-stress test and the baby's heartbeat was totally fine. But they scheduled two more plus a biophysical for next week. This will be the first ultrasound I've had since finding out the sex months ago. I guess they just want to check and make sure all his parts are in working order and how he moves around and reacts to the contractions. Speaking of contractions - I am still having them even though I'm not feeling it. In the 20 minutes that I was hooked up for the NST, I had 3 contractions that I didn't feel. So, my body is working to some extent. Unfortunately, I'm not feeling most of what's going on and when I do feel it, its just not intense enough for me to count them and make sure they're regular for an extended period of time.

At this point, even though I'm not able to count contractions, I am having a ton of back pain and mild cramping (not like contractions, but like period cramps). I am discouraged. I should be holding my baby right now. And if I don't go into labor before 41 weeks and 5 days, they will have to induce me. I want to avoid that SO bad. A woman's body was made to do this - I don't want chemicals to force my baby out.

baby gap should hire us

2011-03-15T19:14:00.000-07:00

Today, I am 39 weeks along in my pregnancy. And I think I'm in labor. With Ronnie, I barely felt my contractions, even on pitocin, so I wasn't sure what to expect this time around. I've definitely been contracting all dag-um day and I feel like I have to take the biggest BM of my life. Yes, I said it. Called up my fabulous midwife and she said to call back when it gets much stronger and intense or if my water breaks. So, now I'm just waiting.

So, since I haven't had to go to the hospital yet, we were able to go get the boys portraits made. Emily, my adopted sister, was able to make a surprise appearance the other day - which is rare. She lives a few hours away and we don't get to see her often, so mom decided to take the opportunity to get the kids together for a photo session. I have to say, I have some amazingly handsome nephews and son. Seriously, get a load of this...

Adorable, isn't it? Hopefully the next time I have a moment to post anything will be to announce the birth of our baby. Keeping my fingers crossed...

what we don't need for our new baby

2011-03-05T05:54:00.000-08:00

For anyone who's been pregnant, you understand the pressure to have "everything you need" for your new baby. There are lists everywhere that recommend what to buy and what to register for. You've got ads and advice coming out of your ears and the need to get every gadget "necessary" to take good care of your baby. With my first, I definitely bought into this idea. Like I've said before, I had way too much stuff. Stuff that actually got on my nerves - that served no purpose or just plain got in the way. Life would have been so much easier for me if I didn't have buckets upon buckets of toys to sanitize, closets full of clothes and blankets, and a dining room so full of baby junk that I had to move my table out of it. The truth is, most of the items marketed to expecting mothers is anything but necessary. What do you really need to care for a baby? Two arms (or some other way of holding him), a good milk supply (breast or bottle), diapers (cloth or disposable), simple clothing, a blanket, and love. Really, that's all you really need. Everything else is just extra.

Of course, it wouldn't be much fun if you had the resources to provide more for your child and didn't, so most of us get more - a lot more! For my second child, I want to find a middle ground. I want to be able to have the cute little things that I love and will find useful without going overboard. Every single item that I purchased for the new baby was thoroughly reviewed and thought through. That said, there are many things I decided NOT to purchase for many of the same reasons.

Probably the most obvious baby items missing from our stash are bottles, bottle warmer, bottle rack, bottle brush, sterilizer, insulated bag, and formula dispenser. Why? I am dead-set on breastfeeding this baby. Knowing what I know now about the benefits of breastfeeding and the dangers of soy or cow-based infant formula, it is my ultimate goal to breastfeed Wade for the first year of his life. The book, Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding, has been an invaluable resource to me during these last couple of weeks. I can see now why Ronnie had a hard time latching on (pitocin and epidural messing up our hormones after birth) and giving him infant formula most likely caused the ear infections that lead to a speech delay and 2 surgeries before he was two-years old. Knowing now that he's also at higher risk for things like diabetes and ADHD kills me. I didn't know that newborn babies only drink about 2 tbsp of colostrum on their first day - I thought I was starving him, so we gave him formula to supplement. Big mistake. Now that I'm a little more knowledgeable about how this stuff works, I'm confident I'll be able to accomplish my goal. That means no bottles and bottle-accessories for me.
Nursing cover. While I do intend to breastfeed, I'm thinking all the fuss over nursing covers is a little out of hand. First of all, I'm a big girl with a big chest - it probably won't cover me. Second of all, won't a blanket do the same thing for much cheaper?
Pacifiers & clip. Aside from interfering with breastfeeding, I just don't think I'm going to need any. My mother-in-law told me a couple of years ago that her kids never took them, so don't expect mine to. I didn't believe her and I bought a bunch for Ronnie, which he never really used. I figure that if the baby wants a paci, we'll use the one that the hospital provides for him. Until then, its just a waste of money.
Swing, exersaucer, walker, bouncer, motion glider. While I did have most of this for my first child, the only thing that worked was the swing. Unfortunately, it took up a lot of space - space that we just don't have in our little apartment. These are expensive items that may not work for every baby. And when it comes down to it, they were created to soothe your baby in ways that you could easily do yourself. Instead, I decided to purchase a moby wrap so that I can hold my baby close and comfort him as I go about my daily activities.
Changing table. I never have understood the reason for this. I did have one at one point because the FCC office required me to for sanitation reasons in my home daycare, but it was big, annoying, and in the way. For Wade, I'll just lay out a blanket or pad to change him on. No big deal about it.
High Chair. Again, I don't have the room for it. But, when considering if I really needed one at all, I decided the answer was no. Wade won't even start on solid foods until he's at least 6-months old. Why store something that big for so long when I'll never use it in the mean time. In addition, I think a little simple booster seat will work a little better for us. It will put him right at the table and take up much less space.
Baby Monitor. Our apartment is so small that I can hear the neighbor's baby crying. I really don't need a monitor to hear my own. We had a nice one that Rob's grandma bought for us, but I decided to donate it since I don't expect I'll need it. Plus, the baby is sleeping in our room and will be attached to me throughout most of the day, so I don't really need any way to monitor him.
Newborn shoes. Seriously? I know they're cute, but I think socks are cuter. They'll keep the baby warm by themselves for a much lower price tag. Babies don't generally start walking until at least 10-months old, so we won't need any shoes until then. Not knowing what size he'll need, I'm not buying any until the time comes.
Diaper stacker, caddy, wipes warmer, nursery sanitizer, and diaper genie. These are all really pointless luxury nursery items that are a total waste of money. I put my diapers in a basket, wash my toys in the dishwasher, and throw the disposable diapers in the trash.
Outlet plugs, baby gate, car window shade, toilet seat latch, night light, and nasal aspirator. You probably think I'm crazy right now. But, these are safety items, right? Why wouldn't I want to protect my baby by having these safety items? Let's address each one. Outlet plugs don't work. Ronnie was able to pull them out as soon as he started crawling. Know what works? Tape. Yes, tape. I cover the plugs with one or two pieces of masking or white duct tape. You barely notice its there, and if you smooth down the edges good, babies can't peel it off. Minimalist baby-proofing. Its been working for almost three years now, so I don't plan on changing my strategy. Like I've said about a million times, our apartment is small. We don't have stairs, so there's no need for me to have a baby gate. I can close the doors I don't want him going through and then I can pretty much see every square inch of the rest of our place. Car window shades always got on my nerves. They were in the way and didn't seem to do too much to help shade the car - its not like it covers the whole window. Toilet seat latches are pretty pointless too. The baby won't even be walking until this time next year, so it would probably just be an annoyance for us to install one right now. Even then, Ronnie figured out how to break it off when he started walking. Overall, good supervision is better than any safety gadget. Why does a baby need a night light? They aren't afraid of the dark and actually sleep better without any visual stimulation. As for nasal aspirators, I discovered that the simple bulb aspirator that they give you at the hospital works better than any fancy gadget I ever bought in a store. I plan on using that one up and then buying another cheapo like it off the internet later.
Crib bumper and skirt. I never really used these when they came with our bedding sets for Ronnie. First, its just added decoration that I think is distracting and its more to wash. With any baby, you already have enough stuff to wash constantly - why add more than you need to? In addition, bumpers have been linked with SIDS and suffocation. I'd rather just let my baby sleep in a plain crib with nothing but a sheet and light blanket.
Baby detergent, baby oil, baby powder, diaper rash cream, medicine. These are all pretty standard items that most parents buy for their new babies; however, I've found better alternatives that aren't as toxic. Instead of baby detergent, I'll be using my simple homemade laundry detergent made with Dr. Kirk's castille soap. Its completely natural, works well, safe for baby, and smells wonderful! Baby oil is made from petroleum. Yep, that's right - like petroleum gasoline. When I took an infant massage class a couple of years ago, the instructor suggested Grapeseed Oil for the massage. It warmed up nice in your hands and really moisturized the baby's skin. I've decided its a good alternative for us. I've never used baby powder - mostly due to the fact that I've read several times that it causes respiratory problems in infants. I've never needed it either. Not sure why people use it, actually. Diaper rash cream scares me. There are so many chemicals in that stuff and the one time I used it on Ronnie, it actually made the rash worse. The best thing I ever used on his bottom was petroleum jelly, but there's that petroleum problem again. Luckily, a couple brands like BabyGanics and Earth's Best make a non-petroleum jelly to use instead. I've noticed that a lot of lists suggest that you buy baby motrin, tylenol, and gas drops for your baby before they're even born. I don't remember needing to use any of this on Ronnie when he was an infant and doubt I'd even use it unless a doctor prescribed some.
Plastic teethers and tons of stuffed animals. For Wade, we have a wooden teether and a natural rubber teether to avoid toxic plastics and a couple of lovey stuffed animals for comfort. I've seen baby rooms filled with little toys and stuffed animals that seem to be distracting to me. I'm happy with just a couple.

What do you think? Am I right about this stuff being pointless or do you think I'm delusional? Let me have it.

Nesting

2011-03-04T17:40:00.000-08:00

Just because I'm a minimalist doesn't mean that I'm going to deprive myself of that wonderful nesting ritual that all mothers go through as they prepare for their little ones' arrival. I've received quite a bit of joy out of preparing our space for baby Wade; however, I've made a concious effort to only purchase the things I need or LOVE for him. According to Leo Babauta, minimalism means "to make room for that which gives us the most joy. Clear away the distractions so we can create something incredible." I take this to mean that I surround myself with the essentials and pieces that I've deliberately chosen and strip away the rest. That said, here's what I've prepared for our little guy:

This is Wade's nook. Its simple. And I like it that way. We expect that he'll be rooming in with us for at least the first 6 months or so - probably co-sleeping much longer but with his belongings moved to share a room with Ronnie. We've taken one wall of our bedroom, along my side of the bed, and set it up with everything he needs.

silver lamp from T.J.Maxx / diy framed art, inspired by Perideau Designs / Sophie La Giraffe teething toy / diy circle mobile inspired by fawn & forest

laundry basket from Babies R Us / Ikea dresser handed down from Ronnie, clear drawers covered with green wrapping paper

Arms Reach mini convertible co-sleeper / Carters bassinet pad / Boppy and cover handed down from Ronnie / Cloud B Sleep Sheep

diaper pail (trash can) from Wal-mart / Planet Wise Diaper Pail Liner

Kissaluvs Fitted Cloth Diapers - since buying my set of cloth diapers, everyone has been telling me how they won't fit the baby at first. Luckily, I had enough reward points with Kelly's Closet to purchase 4 Kissa's size 0 diapers to hold us over (at least part-time) until Wade is big enough for the others. We'll just supplement with chlorine-free diapers. / Cloth wipes - took some hand-me-down receiving blankets and cut them into squares. We'll just wet them with warm water when we need them.

2 towels and 4 rags handed down from a cousin / 10 BabyKicks organic wash cloths / 6 receiving blankets handed down from Ronnie - the 2 top organic ones were bought from Target on clearance / 4 OsoCozy unbleached prefolds (using them as burp cloths) / 1 extra co-sleeper sheet / Yes to Carrots baby lotion / 3 Aden + Anais cotton muslin swaddle wraps (bought with the 50% off gift card Amazon had back in January) / 1 package of newborn Seventh Generation chlorine-free diapers to get us started

7 sleepers / 5 bibs / 10 pairs of socks / 10 onesies / 5 pants / 3 sensory toys / wee gallery art cards

extras for later: crib mirror, bumbo tray, play mat, doorway jumper, baby carrier, backup formula (from the military hospital), backup diaper bag - all of this was given to me, or else I wouldn't have any of it.

Carter's diaper bag - I actually ordered two different handmade custom bags from an etsy shop, but ended up not liking either of them when they arrived. So, I got a refund and bought this one from Burlington Coat Factory - the diaper bag is filled with goodies we'll need at the hospital, which I will lay out in another post, but for now I'll just list them: moby wrap, 1 swaddle wrap, 2 prefolds, chlorine-free diapers & wipes, 2 sleepers, 3 onesies, 1 cap, 4 pairs of socks, 2 pairs of mittens, bamboo grooming kit, non-petroleum jelly, lovey (from Grammy) / puj tub (I am in LOVE with this item and can't wait to use it) - hanging on the back of the bathroom door

12 Bum Genius cloth diapers (and a ton of extra training pants for big brother Ronnie) - under the bathroom sink

6 tops and 2 overalls all handed down from Ronnie / extra clothes 3mo-12mo / and in the bottom of the closet...

A big box full of hand-me-down clothes and shoes!

So, what do we have that you don't see here?

crib - handed down from Ronnie
crib sheets and blankets - all bought or made before Ronnie was even born
portable play pen - a gift from Rob's mom when Ronnie was born
a Graco infant seat - handed down from Ronnie's infant days
car mirror - handed down from a cousin
Graco double stroller - my mom was able to find one discounted at Sears for only $60, so of course I snagged it up!
Method baby wash - I love the rice milk & mallow scent! - in the tub since its what Ronnie currently uses, too.

That's it. That's every single thing we own for baby Wade. Stay tuned to find out what we DON'T own for our baby and why!

Valentine's Day

2011-02-13T13:46:00.000-08:00

I'm a terrible blogger. I have so much to write about without any time to actually get it all out. :) For now, I'll leave you with our V-day goodiness.

We made the buckets for Ronnie's Grammy and Maw-Maw which include a pot holder, a couple of candy bars, and some fruit. The little bags are for each of the ladies in our family: Great Grandma Wilshire, Kayla, Tiffanny. These had an apple and a candy bar. We also threw in a bag for Malechai and added some Mickey stickers to it.

Thanks to some free printables, these were a snap to put together.

Valentines cards from Hello Lucky printed on sticker paper and cut out for labels
DIY Valentine Fruit Stickers from Twig & Thistle

5 Years

2011-01-11T02:00:00.000-08:00

For anyone who ever told me that high school relationships don't last, eat your words bitches. Rob and I celebrate our 5th marriage anniversary today, after 10 years of being in love, and I'm realizing that its time to write down our love story.

It was a cool calm October Thursday night during my sophomore year at Deep Creek High School. Sandi, a great friend of mine, invited me to tag along with her to a chorus concert at the school and, on our way, we ended up stopping to pick up a couple of her friends, Shaun and Robert. I immediately took notice of Rob with his short dark hair and a dark gray pullover on, but didn't think I even had a chance. Of course, I was so incredibly shy that I barely said hello to either of them as we went on our way to the school auditorium. As I remember it, sometime between the car ride and actually sitting in our seats, Shaun - the taller blonder guy - decided to start chatting me up. Like I said, I was shy, so I didn't respond much. I was flattered, but not very interested at that point. I guess my silence was noted, because sometime while trying to listen to the concert, Rob leaned in and said "are you okay? Do you want me to get him to leave you alone?" Ahh. My heart melted. God shined a light on me right in that moment (you know, figuratively - I'm not delusional) and flat out told me that this was my perfect match. All from a whisper. As soon as the concert ended and everyone flooded out to the cafeteria, I had to take my chance to talk to him. I have no clue what we even said, but he somehow left with my phone number and AIM screen name. Yes, these were the days of AIM. As I remember it, I spent that entire night sitting at my computer. Within two days we were dating. And within three weeks, I would have done anything for that boy. I fell fast and hard. And I loved every minute of it.

We were that couple that would spend our entire lunch break sitting outside on the curb just to hold each other. We did everything together and we had no secrets. Before I graduated, I was engaged. And pretty much everyone we knew said it wouldn't last.

Our relationship has taken an incredible amount of work. I won't lie. We were young and stupid most of the time. And selfish. Very selfish. But somehow we always ended up together. We were each able to go off and "find ourselves" - to explore the world around us and experience things as any young person should, but we still ended back up together. That was most certainly in God's plan. I have no doubt.

I am so incredibly lucky to have the husband I have now. One who takes care of his family, who loves me and who absolutely adores his son. No one is perfect, but Rob is exactly what I need in order to get through this crazy life. Because of him, I know what true happiness feels like. I never thought that each and every year I'd love him more and more. He's given me exactly what I've always known I've wanted - a stable family and a soft place to land.

Hello 2011!

2010-12-30T18:10:00.000-08:00

[image source]

This weekend we celebrate the dawn of a new year. Hello 2011! I'm so excited about what's to come of my life and my family during the next 12 months that I can hardly stand it. But, before I move on to all dreams and hopes for the coming year, I'd like to take a moment to reflect on this past year. A lot happened in 2010. So much so that I can honestly say I'm totally a different person than I was on January 1. Let's reminisce:

I strengthened my relationship with my husband through date nights and a little 50s experiment.
I made a conscious decision to become a minimalist. Through slow progression, I've decluttered most of my life and truly enjoy the simplicity I have created for myself. My husband rarely has to lecture me about shopping anymore and it's not often that I feel the need to spend for the heck of it. I have exactly what I need and I'm truly content with the life I have.
Ronnie turned two and we threw him a super fun Mickey Party.
I decided to start focusing more in my design work and it paid off in a big way. I'm now actually self-employed and contributing financially to my family again. Woohoo!
We sat down together and created our family mission statement, which has helped us to stay on track even through our most stressful times.
We found out we were expecting another miracle baby.
I turned 25 and had a quarter-life crisis (but really it could have been the pregnancy hormones I didn't know I was having).
I found out I'm weird, but that's okay. Knowing about my Misophonia has helped me to deal with it better.
I retired my "army wife" boots and settled into life back home in Chesapeake, VA. God blessed our family by providing a place to live and a job for Rob within 2 weeks of hitting that sweet Virginia air.

So, what's next? Last year, I laid out all these goals that I wanted to accomplish, but most things fell flat before the halfway point. This year I have one goal in mind: consume less and live more.

[image source]

I'm pretty flexible about how I want to go about accomplishing my one goal this year, but I have a few ideas:

Buy USA made and ethically produced imported products. This basically means I can't shop at Wal-mart anymore. Just like checking the nutritional information on food, I've got to start checking the "Made in ..." label on products. By buying American, I'm making a conscious effort to support our safety regulations and humane business practices associated with the products I buy. Also, in a time of economic crisis, I'd rather my money go back into the hands of Americans rather than our Chinese lenders.
Buy more local foods and products. By getting the things I need from places nearby, I'll end up consuming less through transportation costs and I can put a little more money in the pockets of small business owners, rather than large corporations. Bonus - its healthier too. I just found out that Farm Fresh is actually a local chain specific to Hampton Roads. I'll choose that over Wal-mart or Food Lion any day. In addition to local farmers markets in the summer, I can shop for regional produce at the 5 Points Community Farm Market during the winter. Yipee skipee.
Better yet, try growing my own food. I have a history of killing every plant I touch, so I'm not sure if this would work out, but it sure does look appealing. I think growing your own food and sustaining your family's nutritional needs on your own is the ultimate in independence and freedom.
Go paperless. I've tried a few times to do this, but the paper keeps piling up. Granted, I've made progress over the past year, but I'd love to have no papers scattered about anymore.

Explore new ways to eliminate cleaning products from my cabinets. I usually use vinegar and baking soda for most jobs, but this idea to use grapefruit and salt in your tub looks interesting. I may even start to make my own dishwashing and laundry detergent.
Change up my beauty routine. I've been hesitant to go "no-poo" but I think once my current bottles of shampoo and conditioner run out, I'll give it a try. I'm also ditching my deodorant for a simple powder puff of baking soda instead (I've been doing this for about a week now and it works so much better!). One more step I'm taking is to switch to a preserve toothbrush and Tom's of Maine toothpaste.
Eliminate the trash. Okay, one major motivator for this one is most certainly the fact that we live on the third floor and I refuse to haul the trash down everyday with a toddler in tow. Its only going to get worse once the baby arrives, so I've got to prevent it from piling up in the first place. I'd like to get our trash load down to one bag a week. That's a hefty task for our family - but I've got a year to do it. Some ways I'm eliminating trash are:

Stop buying ziploc bags. I plan to borrow a sewing machine and make some reusable cloth sandwich bags to use instead. I've got quite a bit of scrap fabric just taking up space in my closet and I think this will be a good use of it.
Stop buying ziploc / gladware / presto plastic containers. I just invested in two sets of glass containers (USA made) with a gift-card I got on Christmas. I'm also planning on saving any glass jars (like for spaghetti or mayo) to use for storage as well. And, of course, you can never go wrong with mason jars.
Use washable shopping bags so I don't have to keep throwing away those cheapo $1 polypropylene/canvas bags anymore. I just purchased four Flip & Tumble bags with another gift card and I can't wait to get them in!
Stop eating fast food. In addition to the fact that it has no nutritional value, fast food seems to dirty up my car faster than anything else. There's too much trash involved. From here on out, when I stop for a sweet tea, I'll ask them to fill up my reusable water bottle instead.
Cloth diapering.

So, there it is. That's the plan. It WILL change. I now know myself well enough to get that. But, its a framework. Its the path I want to take this year and I'm going for it. What is your goal for 2011?

If we are ever going to be BFF's you should know this......

2010-12-20T19:19:00.000-08:00

[source]

One of my favorite bloggers, Ashley at Little Miss Momma, just posted her own list of things we should know, so I decided to follow along...

I own 3 pairs of shoes - sandals, flip-flops, and a pair of sneakers I've had since high school (8 years ago). Of course, these days I wear my hubby's house slippers with everything because my feet are too swollen. I'd like to credit my love of minimalism, but I'll be honest and admit that I just hate shopping for a size 11-12 shoe.
I can go weeks without shaving my legs. Praise God for wintertime.
I am a closet slob. I've been working to fix this issue, but don't open my closet doors.
I rarely ever wear makeup but use a total of 8 beauty products daily: shampoo, conditioner, body wash, face wash, feminine wash, facial moisturizer, tooth paste, lotion. I'd love to pare that down, but I'm too afraid to go "no-poo".
I have no problem washing laundry, but I usually have 2 or 3 loads waiting to be folded and put away.
We don't have a TV in our living room. I do have one in the bedroom - an old set that cost me $10 at a yard sale a few years back. And the only reason we use it is because our landlord gives us free cable. But, we don't get local channels. Weird.
I own an iron, but I can't think of the last time I used it.
The first thing my husband ever said to me was in a whisper. From then on, I was in love.
I don't like to drive at night. Something about my depth perception is off and it scares the crap out of me.
I CAN NOT eat tomatoes. But marinara, ketchup, salsa, etc. is okay as long as it isn't too chunky.
I know how to fold a fitted sheet, but I flub it up anyway and shove it in the closet.
I hate talking on the phone. And I don't text. Get me in person and I don't shut up.
My husband and I dream of being debt-free with a simple home. But we want a boat big enough and comfortable enough to go on our own family cruises.
Nothing kills me more than to see someone smoking around a child - or not washing up after smoking and then picking up a child. I just cringe!
Sometimes, I have to listen to rain sounds or classical music to drown out annoying noises.
I wear a freakin' 40F bra size. I REALLY hope there's a reduction in my future. I was always known as the girl with big boobs, but now its ridiculous. A D cup in high school was a good thing - It should have just stopped there.

What about you.. what should I know about you if we are going to be BFF's??

The Tree

2010-12-10T13:23:00.000-08:00

So how long do you wait before taking down the Christmas tree?

Me? Oh, I can make it 'till around December 10.

What?! Its not even Christmas yet? Oh my....

We started out the weekend after Thanksgiving. We all sat down together one night and decorated the tree - after I had spent hours myself putting together the ancient 6-foot lightless thing. I had an interesting time stringing the lights, but when all was said and done, we were proud of our first full-sized Christmas tree.

The very next day I felt cluttered. I ended up rearranging my furniture a bit to give the tree a little more breathing space, which helped for another 24 hours until I felt the clutter again. After putting most of the ornaments BACK on the tree (after little hands had strategically removed them) and uncovering my 9-month old nephew from under the tree when he pulled it down on top of himself, I had decided enough was enough. I sat back and gave the tree a good look:

And that's when I started taking it down. It took all of 30 minutes before I was hauling the thing back to the storage closet. And this is what I put in its place:

Nice and simple. No ornaments to clean up and no fear of killing a child with it. Ronnie has already asked me where the lights are, but I don't feel so bad - we're going to the beach tonight to check out the enormous drive-through lights display there. I don't think he'll be missing his Christmas tree lights at home.

Just A Thought

2010-12-08T12:33:00.000-08:00

[image source]

If the theory of "trickle-down" economics really worked, then why are the large corporations and banks richer now after the bail-out and all the "emergency" measures, yet unemployment is still climbing?

To be honest, I'm a little ticked off by what's going on in Washington right now. Yes, even with our dear Mr. President. I probably wouldn't have many qualms with paying more taxes myself if I could feel safe and certain that my husband, parents, siblings, friends wouldn't have to worry about loosing their jobs any time soon in a declining economy. We have to fix what's going on, but I think they're just making it worse!

Let's tell the rich that they can have their tax cut once they've created enough jobs to warrant one. Wasn't it corporate greed that got us into this mess? Why reward bad behavior??

randomness 12.5.10

2010-12-05T07:21:00.000-08:00

Everyone here at the Bocks residence is sick. I feel awful, but there are things that must be done, so I don't get to lay around and do nothing. Neither does Rob - he still has to go to work. He doesn't get paid if he doesn't go to work. So, he's working. I'm sanitizing and grocery shopping and washing clothes and diapers. And Ronnie is crying for every bit of attention we've got left. Not fun.
I was pretty syked to set up Ronnie at Rob's mom's house yesterday so I could go to a baby safety show down at Waterside with my mom, an old friend (who's due a day after me), and her mom. Then, I was pretty bummed when we got there and realized it was just a bad sales pitch for over-priced baby junk. Apparently, others have had the same experience. On the invitation, there was a promise of baby safety and CPR information, along with a free gift package valued at $139 and discounted baby items. I was all geared up to see the latest cute stuff and to walk away with samples and free gifts. No. I walked away with astonishment and a coupon for 9 free sitting fees at JC Penny. Oh, and a CPR DVD.
The other day, Ronnie told me to get out of his bubble. I knew he'd turn that one around on me sooner rather than later.
I started keeping my nephew so my sister could work a temporary job selling Christmas trees. Boy, I think I'm going to need quite a bit of practice before having to deal with my own 2 kids all the time. I was worn out. It wasn't the baby stuff that was exhausting - it was actually my toddler and his shenanigans. He wasn't too happy about Malechai being here all day. Ronnie definitely showed his butt and displayed some jealousy. When it was time to go get Rob from work, Ronnie threw the biggest tantrum I've ever seen him have and refused to leave the apartment for at least 15 minutes. Then, when we finally got out the door, he would stop at each of the stair landings and just sit there. I was already holding a baby, so I couldn't just pick him up and make him go. That was frustrating!
Ronnie is now asleep right behind me in my office chair - leaned up against my back sleeping. I'm sitting on the edge of the chair just to accommodate him. Is this cute? Yes, but kind of uncomfortable.
For a couple of years now, I've been seeing this Sophie La Girafe toy everywhere in blog world. Sure, its cute, but I didn't get why it cost $35 for a little toy. Since I've got a new bundle of joy on the way, I decided to look it up. Its a teether toy made from 100% natural rubber, meaning from tree sap! Its dyed with natural food colors, so its completely safe for baby. I broke down and had to buy it. I'd rather have this than any little $5 teether toy at Wal-mart. So, I went on the hunt and found one on ebay for $16. Not bad. Its now sitting on my desk smiling at me and I can't wait to let Wade play with it.
I have so much more to say, but mom and dad just invited me to IHOP. Umm...apple crepes...yum....gotta go.

Adventures in Cloth Diapering

2010-12-02T05:43:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, my cloth diapers arrived! I took advantage of the Black Friday sale that Kelly's Closet was having and got 12 Bum Genius One Size Pocket Diapers for only $170 plus free shipping. I also managed to get triple rewards points on the order, so in a couple of months I can turn those in to get the Aden + Anais Muslin Swaddles that I want - for free.

When the box arrived, Ronnie and I quickly tore open the packages to get a good look at these babies. They are so soft and cute! We popped them in the washer for the recommended hot wash and extra rinse then threw the inserts into the dryer and line-dried the covers out on our very small patio.

I actually got a bit of joy out of putting them together and folding them up into a neat little basket. Now, instead of having a huge box of disposable diapers underneath the bathroom sink, all I need is this little neat minimal basket of cute adorable cloth dipes.

We had to go pick Rob up from work yesterday, so on the way home I managed to talk him into doing the DIY diaper sprayer (tutorial from Gidget Goes Home) for me. I had already gone to Lowe's and got a very nice gentlemen to round up all the stuff for me. I was clueless standing there in front of the plumbing materials, so I was so glad we he came to my rescue. Now, usually I'm a hoverer and I end up telling Rob what to do when it comes to DIY stuff at home. This time, I just let him have at it and used every bit of strength I had to STAY OUT OF THE BATHROOM. To my amazement, a few minutes later I heard the trickle of water from the sprayer. (Please ignore the major clutter everywhere!)

Ronnie has been through 3 of the cloth diapers and they've all been just wet, so I haven't had to deal with poop yet. But so far, so good. We're used to his disposable diaper leaking just about every night no matter what brand we use, so it was quite a nice surprise to wake up to no leaks anywhere with the cloth diaper. I'm certainly impressed - I may not have to wash his sheet every day now. lol. It only took Ronnie a few minutes to get used to the new feeling, but I think he likes it. He couldn't wait to show it off to his Daddy last night.

Here's Ronnie hiding from me and laughing because I wanted to take his picture. But you can still see that cute diaper.

Now, Ronnie is just over 35 pounds and these diapers just barely fit him, so I don't expect we'll be able to use them for long on him, but he should be potty-trained soon (let's hope). This is just a trial run for baby Wade anyhow as we'll get way more use out of them for him.

Stay tuned to see how it goes. :)

Momma Thinkin'

2010-11-23T05:35:00.000-08:00

Tonight, I can't sleep. And its partially due to Wade's restless movements, but also because I've been thinking. Its that darned momma thinkin'. Planning it all out. What can I change this time around to "get it right". Don't get me wrong, I absolutely believe that I am doing my best by Ronnie in every way. What parent doesn't make mistakes? But, there are lessons you learn with your first child. Maybe I'll correct a few things this time around. Maybe I'll make a few different mistakes. I don't know.

See, before Ronnie was born, I thought there was one right way to raise an infant Heck, I'd had a hand in raising so many myself - I just thought that was the way it should be done. Every baby I had known was formula fed, wore disposable diapers, slept alone in a crib, became attached to a blanket or snugli, took a paci, had all these high-tech noisy light-up toys for entertainment, used a walker, and every effort was made not to spoil the child into thinking he could be held all the time. That works for some people. But it didn't work for me as a parent.

With Ronnie, I dipped my toe into making my own parenting path, but I wish I had done more. I actually made quite a few unpopular decisions and that empowered me in some way. I felt better knowing that I did my research and chose for myself how I would do things. For one, I started to go green. It was a very gradual change in our lives, but after a while it became second nature. I started using things like vinegar and baking soda to clean my house instead of the highly toxic cleaners and chlorine bleach. I stopped using paper towels all together and opted for rags and towels instead. We stopped eating over-processed food out of a box and opted for organic or all-natural whenever we could. In fact, I very rarely ever buy anything without reading the ingredients label now. We cut down our meat-consumption drastically. There's so much to list, I don't think I could even come up with it all. This was a big change for us. And soon after I started, certain things became more popular - like using reusable shopping bags and water bottles. That made things so much easier.

Another big change I made was that I quit working and became a stay-at-home mom. This is highly unpopular in our circles. Growing up, I thought that moms who stayed home with their kids were lazy. They must have had kids so that they wouldn't have to work. And then there's those that think that moms just sit around and twiddle our thumbs all day. That must be so boring! Working in the child care arena, I couldn't imagine the thought of anyone other than me making the day-to-day decisions for my child. I wanted to be the one to sing songs with him, to watch him play, to care for his every need. For us, it was also a logical move. I was barely making minimum wage at the time, so daycare would have sucked up my income. Actually, staying home proved to be more financially sound for our family because, not only did we save money on child care, but I actually made way more money from the comfort of my own home. While Rob was deployed, I ran a 24-hour child care center right in my living room. Because I was certified by the army, I got paid by the parents and by the government. That was some fancy cheese, let me tell you. Once Rob came back home, it wasn't very reasonable to continue so I changed paths. Now, I'm doing pretty well doing something I love - designing. And I never have to leave my son to do it. He can sit right beside me and color or even sit in my lap and talk to me or sing songs while I work.

Once Ronnie was born, even more changes came about. I think everyone remembers the big ordeal about BPA in our bottles. That was one of the first changes I made - I drastically reduced anything plastic that could pose a BPA threat to my baby, like bottles, spoons, bowls, toys, etc and bought BPA and phalate-free versions instead. That spurred some interest in toys, so I started to research. The lack of regulation in the toy industry is alarming. And what's with almost every single toy being made in China? These are the people that had infant deaths from something in their baby formula. I don't trust them to make my child's toys. Unfortunately, its just about unavoidable. Ronnie has several toys made in China in his room right now. But it did make me think twice about my purchases. I prefer wood toys with non-toxic lead-free paint, preferably made in the USA. And I also prefer simple toys that require a little imagination to play with. Ronnie has very few toys that make noise or light up. I think he gets more out of it and doesn't get bored too easily. Afterall, every play experience is a learning experience.

Now, lets talk about sleeping arrangements. I tried to ferberize Ronnie. I thought it was the best thing for him. That is, until he became so over-tired one day that he cried literally for 6 hours straight, even when I picked him up and held him. After a spastic call to the nurse's line and a very long warm bath, he finally fell asleep in bed with me. A few months after Rob deployed to Afghanistan, I finally gave up and let Ronnie sleep with me pretty permanently. At this point, I hadn't even heard of co-sleeping or attachment parenting, so I felt really guilty. But I also felt very rewarded to be able to sleep right beside such a precious being. We both got the sleep we needed and we enjoyed a little bit of momma-son intimacy that strengthened our bond quite a bit. He still took naps in the bassinet, but night-time was for cuddles with mommy. To this day, Ronnie still gets in bed with us in the middle of the night from time to time. And we actually love it. It makes everyone happier and its a special little time when we all wake up together with smiles on our faces. Wade will be sleeping with us from day one until he's ready to move into the room with his big brother. I've already mentioned how I plan to get a co-sleeper, so even if all four of us are in there together, we'll fit without crushing the baby.

And then there's breastfeeding. This is such a debate and has been for several years now. I tried to breastfeed Ronnie from day one, but the little guy would not latch on. Thanks to the WIC office, I was able to get a pump and provide him with breast milk for about the first month and a half, but I would have rather been able to do it all the way. At the time, I told myself that not everyone can breastfeed. Although I had no problem with milk production, it was absolutely exhausting to pump then feed and then it was time to pump again. I felt awful about giving him formula, but I told myself that most babies drink formula and they're perfectly fine. And really, my only concern was providing him with the antibodies. I hadn't even considered the fact that formula could actually be bad for him. He was just fine for a while, until about 4 months old when he started having ear infections. I had heard that baby formula had been linked with ear infections, but I thought "what's the big deal? Every baby gets an ear infection some time". I had seen it over and over again. Well, two years, two surgeries, and 9 months of speech therapy later, I can tell you that I totally regret giving my baby formula. I wish I had stuck it out and pumped as long as I possibly could and maybe he would eventually latch on.

To top it off, Ronnie became lactose intolerant because of the massive amounts of antibiotics he was taking, especially one in particular called omnicef. This medicine made him so sick that he had to be placed on IV fluids twice. It took his GI tract over a year to recover from that damage. Only through small amounts of organic milk have we built his tolerance back up. Now, he can have yogurt, cheese, milk, ice cream, whatever, but its still better is small doses. If I can avoid all this by simply breastfeeding as long as I can, I will. I hope, pray, cross-my-fingers that Wade will be able to breastfeed and get it right before we even leave the hospital.

And finally to the particular topic that's had me up thinking tonight - diapers. When Ronnie was about 6 months old, I discovered that some people were still using cloth diapers. I didn't even know this was an option! The more and more I looked into it, the more I realized how much money I could save and how much it would really help the environment. Plus, these aren't your great-grandma's cloth diapers. These things are cute! With adorable colors and patterns. I convinced myself - I was going to cloth diaper Ronnie from there on out. I went online, ordered the starter package and got myself set for the challenge. And then the box arrived. I looked at it for a while and then all of a sudden an image of poop sloshing around in my washing machine came into focus. Umm....no. Return to sender. I just couldn't fathom the the idea of dealing with that. Now, two years later, I'm realizing that I was pretty off in my perception. Thanks to the power of the internet and the increasing popularity (although still very unpopular) of cloth diapering, I have been watching videos, looking at tutorials, and reading hundreds of accounts of other parents who have done it with success. I'm ready to do it this time around, from the very beginning. Just my luck, FuzziBunz One-Size pocket diapers will be on sale for $14.95 a piece on Black Friday - a mere 3 days away. Dude, I'm totally getting some. Even if I only end up actually using them for three months out of the 2.5+ years that Wade will be in diapers, I will have saved money. PLUS, since the one-size diapers fit any baby from birth to potty-training, I can use them on Ronnie for the next few months and pay for them in diaper savings before Wade is even born. That'll get some practice in for me and may even help with Ronnie's potty training.

Well, I got it all out. I have defended my decisions to the blog world. Maybe I can get some sleep now. G'nite!

The Run-Down

2010-11-22T23:52:00.000-08:00

Hello again blog world! Its been a while. Our life has changed so drastically over the last 2 months and I wish I had been a good blogger and logged every detail. Unsurprisingly, I'm not. So, for the sake of time, here's the run-down:

We moved from Kentucky to Virginia. Rob is out of the Army. He got a job almost immediately working for Perdue (a chicken factory - um, the enemy) in the maintenance department of their grain plant. He actually LOVES the job. He works about 10-12 hours a day 6 days a week, which totally sucks for me but he says he'd love to have that job even without a family so he doesn't feel like he's slaving away while we're enjoying the good life. On the bright side, now he actually gets paid for his overtime. The funny thing is that I was so worried he wouldn't make enough outside of the army to sustain a family. I was DEAD WRONG. I'm proud to say that my amazing husband not only kicks ass, but now he makes about 150% of what he used to. I was really scared about health insurance, too, but I think that's going to work out. Its definitely not going to be as bad as I thought it was.

Moving on... We were looking for a house when we got here, but we ended up in an apartment complex less than .5 mile from my mom's house. We're on the 3rd floor. Yea, imagine carrying groceries up with a toddler in tow. Not possible. Luckily, since the fam is so close, I can usually grab a helper. Our apartment is very small, but I actually like it. We've minimized so much since the summer that everything fits perfectly in our space WITHOUT a storage unit. I even have places planned out for the baby stuff we'll need. Though, I still have a whole corner of my room dedicated to boxes of crap for a yard sale. Hopefully, that will happen in the next few weeks and I'll be done with it.

I am now 23 weeks pregnant and every single stinkin' day is different for me. I can't sleep. All I can do is sleep. I want to eat everything sight. I don't have an appetite at all. The baby won't stop moving. I haven't felt the baby in a while. Do you catch my drift? I can tell this kid is going to be trouble. The biggest thing that sticks out about his behavior already is that he likes to kick straight down. Those little kicks at the front of the belly are so heart-warming and cute. But those jabs to your cervix make you jolt in pain and wonder if he's going to kick his way out. I think he also likes to sit directly against my sciatic nerve, too. Picture me standing in a pew singing in church and all of a sudden my body awkwardly jerks in pain. That's what this kid does. He pushes all the wrong spots.

Ronnie is doing AMAZING! His speech has sky-rocketed since we've been around so much family. He's following directions better and I can actually discipline him because he understands me. He absolutely adores his little baby cousin, Malechai. We always have something to do now, so he's taking in so many new experiences. We live right across the street from the church, which he gets so excited about. Sometimes, when we're getting out of the car he'll take my hand and lead me to the street, saying "walk". I have to explain that its not church time yet, but we'll walk over there on Sunday. Its so awesome how he loves going! He actually stopped taking naps, which can be difficult some days, but he usually goes right to bed without any kind of fight at 7:30pm. Not bad. We've made little progress on potty-training, but I'm trying to give him some time and space with it. We just moved and a bunch changed for him. Then we've got the holidays coming up and then a baby will be here. I want him to make the decision to start using the potty when he's ready. We've had a couple days where he wore underwear around the house for a while and once he went on the potty at church. He loves to read his potty book and sometimes he'll ask to just sit on the potty, but never goes. I'm proud of the progress he's made, even though we're not quite there yet.

Wade's First Photo Shoot

2010-11-09T04:51:00.000-08:00

As it turns out, I will be the only girl in our little family. We're having another boy! And, contrary to a recent post, we've decided to name him Wade Lee.

Maybe I've just gotten better at seeing these things lately, but I think these ultrasound pictures look amazing! And so detailed! It was so cool to see our baby moving around in my belly. Its amazing how these little creatures inside of us actually look like little people at this point.

Here's Wade's profile shot. This was actually the hardest to get because he was breach and he kept moving. Look at that little button nose and cute kissable lips!

Here's where he started doing yoga poses. Do you see the downward-facing dog? His legs are above his head and he's holding his feet.

Here's Wade with his legs crossed.

This one was right at the end. He wouldn't get his fist out of his face for the profile picture and then all of a sudden he stuck up that finger. Its like he was saying, "I'm number one!"

This is Wade's first footprints. There's two little feet with 10 little toes!

And last, but certainly not least, Wade's little man parts. I think you can only get away with this on ultrasound pictures. lol!

On Second Thought

2010-10-04T18:21:00.000-07:00

I am really hoping that none of my 20 readers read my last post. It has already been deleted and I hope I rethought that one in enough time. I have had a rough week - partly because I'm a ball of nerves and I'm sensitive to the slightest little things these days and partly because our life is changing and I feel so many emotions at once that I don't know what to think.

My husband is also having a little moment right now, which kicked off an awful weekend. He, for some reason, felt the need to go out and socialize with people he barely knows Friday night, which would probably be fine if it was normal for my husband at all. Its not. We stay home and do things together. That's just our thing. I was a little hurt that he left me that night, but I expected to get over it quickly, realizing that he just needed a moment to blow off steam. When he didn't show back up until 5am - I got pissed, which created a rocky weekend for us all. The next day, I was particularly harsh on him and every little thing he did sent me through the roof. It all accumulated at the end of the night after we put Ronnie to bed. I went straight to my computer to finish up some design work I've been trying to get off my plate, when he decided to come up right behind me with a box full of doughnuts and ask me questions while he ate them. I have no clue what he even asked me, because I was too focused on the sound of saliva breaking down every particle of chocolate doughnut in his mouth. I asked him to please go into the kitchen with it, but I guess he didn't hear me because he stood right there and kept talking to me. I couldn't think. I was going into a panic attack, so I threw my arms up in the air and screamed, "LEAVE!" I am very ashamed to say that this happens quite often with me, especially when I'm stressed. Even though I didn't mean for him to leave the apartment entirely, he grabbed his keys and drove off. I felt awful. He eventually returned with a can of dip (yuk!), which made me even more furious with him because he had told me that he quit dipping. A-whole-nother dilemma later, we both went to bed angry at each other and I tossed and turned all night questioning why I had acted so mean towards him. His words, "it's like hell living with you," resonated so harshly with me. I don't want my own husband to hate living with me. I love him and he loves me - why can't I make things a little easier on him?

Not able to sleep, I woke up super early on Sunday morning and started doing a little research. I was trying to find something on super-hearing because since I was a young teenager, I've had this problem with everyday sounds bothering the be-Jesus out of me. It made it almost impossible to live peacefully with my family and its definitely wreaked havoc on my marriage. I've been told by therapists that its a control issue and I have to learn to "get over it," but obviously I haven't had much luck with that since I'm now 25 and its gotten worse. I've always known that it had to be something more, but I had just never found out what. Online, I found something similar, called Hyperacusis, but I wasn't experiencing all of the symptoms and it was all a little off. Then, for some reason, I clicked a little link at the bottom of the wikipedia page that said "Misophonia." It took me here and all of a sudden I was reading about my life, verbatim.

For some reason, people with Misophonia/Soft Sound Sensitivity Syndrome have certain trigger noises, often associated with the mouth, that create an involuntary fight or flight response. Obviously, logically I understand that the sound of my husband eating a doughnut won't kill me, but for some reason my brain thinks its dangerous and my body has a physical reaction to it. I have lashed out at family members for making the slightest noises - yelled, screamed, cried, even ran out of the room. When I was a teenager, I had to wear earplugs around the house because I couldn't take all the noises. But that ended up making things worse because I started hearing everything with the ear plugs in. It made relationships with my family members very difficult. To them, I was just being a bitch. But to me, I felt like I was going crazy and I couldn't control it. Things got much better when I moved to Texas and spent most of my time alone. I didn't have 7 other people in the household to contend with. But my husband got the brunt of it.

Things have started to get worse again lately. I'm harsher on Rob for just about everything he does. And my neighbors hate me for constantly showing up at their door asking them to turn the TV or radio down. To give you perspective, my triggers are:

eating noises: chewing, slurping, drinking, swallowing
bass in music or tv / deep voices heard from far away
repetitive movements (not just the noise, but the action) like leg tapping, finger/toe twitching, hair twirling, face picking
utensils clanking against dishes
"s" sounds - I specifically remember going nuts anytime I was in the car with my mom because she would always sing with the radio and I kept hearing "s..ss...ss..sss." Drove me nuts and her best friend thought I was the worst teenager in the world for going berserk over it.
lip smacking
heavy breathing / snoring
mouse clicking (try living with this one when your husband is an avid gamer!)
nail biting
ticking clocks
licking and kissing
other people's headphones - I have woken up out of a dead sleep because I could hear Rob watching a movie on his laptop with his headphones in - sucks for both of us.

Now, you might be thinking that all of these sounds can be annoying, but I think my response to them is pretty severe. I often feel panic, anxiety, confusion, lack of focus, tense, and a feeling of wanting to either hurt the person or run away. Let me elaborate and say that I would never get violent over this, but I have shouted and cried over the feeling.

What I found most interesting about Misophonia/4S is that in all known patients, it has presented during puberty and most have started with triggers from a particular family member - the one you are most emotionally connected to. For me, it was my mom. I couldn't be in the same room with her when she ate. I would constantly hassle her for her nervous habits (she has many!). I couldn't even hug her. And she thought I hated her, but the opposite was true. I loved her so much and I didn't understand why I felt so negatively towards her.

You can imagine how this has affected the way I see myself and how uncomfortable I am in social situations. I hate feeling this way. I really wish I could just get over it. To date, I have not let it stop me from living a normal happy life. But now that I know I'm not just crazy or mean, I can start focusing on how to fix the problem. My family members can be understanding of the fact that I can't help what I feel. And I can be more understanding as well and know that its my problem and its up to me to solve the issue.

Since this condition has only been recognized since 1997, there is little to no actual scientific data on it. What is known is because of an audiologist who has treated or consulted for about 300 cases. There are also two online support communities - one in the UK with about 170 members and another in the US with around 1300. It would seem that this condition is very rare; however, I wonder how many others there are out there who, like me, thought that they were just crazy.

It is believed that the issue with Misophonia sufferers lies in both neurological and psychological reasoning. There is actually nothing wrong with the hearing. And from what I've read, there's not much a doctor can do as there isn't a known cure yet. Audiologists are using Tinnitus Retraining Therapy, but it doesn't look like insurance covers that and it would have to be an audiologist who specializes in this particular field. I'm not sure if I'll even talk to a doctor about it - until I know there's something they can do to help.

I really like the idea of an ear piece that emits a continuous loop of white noise. Currently, I'm using rainymood.com to drown out my trigger noises when I'm at home and it has helped a lot. If I could take that with me everywhere, I'd be golden!

I know I'm weird, but now I know I'm not alone. My husband always tells me how I will never find another person like me because of my issues, but he was wrong. There are at least another thousand or so out there - and they are trying to find ways of coping with it too. I see a bright future for me and my family. What a great time to discover this - right before we move home and I'm around the people I love the most. We don't have to live with the same tension we had before. I want to cope better and I need them to understand what's actually going on. I love them more than anything and I don't want to hurt their feelings anymore!

Random Thoughts 9.26.10

2010-09-26T12:54:00.000-07:00

We are moving in 12 days!
My first trimester is over - thank goodness! My nausea and energy are back to normal - just dealing with some nasty headaches lately. My first 13 weeks made me feel so worthless and helpless as I just didn't have the energy/drive to do the things I normally do. I think I'm making a come back, though. Poor Rob has been such an excellent husband by cleaning, doing laundry, and helping with Ronnie every chance he gets. I have been really lucky. And I plan to pay him back over the coming weeks.
Dog the Bounty Hunter rocks out loud. Seriously - we love them. I managed to watch the first six seasons of the show over the last 2 months and I can't wait for more.
Speaking of TV, I'm so glad the fall season has started. Grey's Anatomy, The Practice, The Apprentice, Desperate Housewives, Brothers and Sisters, House - I could go on and on!
Thanks to several documentaries about the food industry, we've been making changes to the way we eat. I'll explain more about this later, but we've just started a meat-free week. No, I'm not some crazed animal activist - I do believe that God gave us animals for nutrition among other reasons. I just want my family to be healthy and we just can't afford the good stuff all the time.
We've finally picked out our names for the baby. We knew the girl name right away since we just carried it over from the first time. Well, sort of. If Ronnie were a girl, we would have named her Magdalena Mae, after a great-aunt and my nanny (great-grandma), and we would have called her Maggie. Now that some people refuse to call our son Ronnie but rather insist on calling him Ronald, I've decided to skip the nicknames and just name her what we'll call her - Maggie Mae. Apparently this is a Rod Stewart song? The boy name wasn't so easy - it took us 10 weeks to come up with! We must have been through thousands of names. Some were just too exotic and some were just too plain. We wanted something that had meaning to us and still stayed true to our southern nature. We finally landed on Lee Dell. Lee is a strong family name on both sides - my grandfather, uncle, and cousin and Rob's grandfather, cousin, and aunt. But we weren't even considering that when we first mentioned it. It was actually Leo Babauta's name that made me think of Lee. We both liked it - the first name we both liked! Then we realized how close it was to us. Great! We had picked our potential son's first name. Now what would his middle name be? Ah, a whole new dilemma. Name after name, we just couldn't nail it down. Then last night as I'm watching the season premier of The Practice, I glanced at the shot of Dell's gravestone and it hit me. Lee Dell. I shouted out to Rob, who was playing video games a few feet away and, without hesitation, he said, "I like it". So there we have it, Lee Dell. This morning, I decided to look up the name meaning of Dell. It means "a meadow" which is far from interesting, but it gets better. I then looked up Lee, and guess what it means? "The meadow!" How weird is it that we picked two names that mean the exact same thing? Almost as interesting - all four names (Maggie, Mae, Lee, and Dell) are from English decent. None of that was on purpose, but it all worked out that way nonetheless.

A little of this and that

2010-07-29T22:52:00.000-07:00

Well, first-trimester pregnancy symptoms are in full swing. On one hand, this is good - my body is working overtime to create a healthy environment for my baby. On the other - can someone please shoot me? I got through 20 hours of labor with a smile on my face, but I'm a total whimp when it comes to nausea. And I have the kind of nausea that just lingers and makes me move in slow-mo. I haven't actually vomited yet, but that's no surprise. When I was pregnant with Ronnie, I was super sick the first 4 to 5 months but only threw up about 3 times. What a lovely topic to start off with, eh?

So, Rob has definitely stepped up to the plate and is helping me out more around the house and with Ronnie. He acts like he doesn't want to be sympathetic, because I'm not "pregnant enough yet" but he's really being a sweetie on the sneak. He's about to leave on Saturday for ~~a total waste of time~~ NTC training in California for a month. I'm a little nervous because I'm really relishing in the fact that I have him to help me out when I can't get everything done (my 3-hour naps aren't helping in that arena).

Hopefully, I'll be able to pull myself up by the boot straps and spend most of our time outside of the house - where I don't have to clean up the constant messes. Which reminds me, I totally forgot to help clean up after a playdate today. Megan, if you're reading this - I will totally understand if henceforth I am known as the worst playdate mom ever! I'm calling you first thing tomorrow! But, really, by outside of the house I mean the park and the mall and the chick-fil-a playground. Seriously, anywhere but here. I'm so tired of staring at this little apartment and my computer screen. Today, which is Thursday, was the first time I had been out of the house since we went grocery shopping on Sunday. On one hand, I feel so awful that I don't feel like doing anything, but on the other staying around the house and not getting out is making me feel worse, I think.

Rob got some brownie points tonight when he took us out for supper. I didn't have to cook or clean up dishes and I got the fabulously delicious steak I've been craving. I couldn't eat much else - even though I usually LOVE the bloomin' onion, the ranch-covered salad, and the loaded baked potato. It actually made me a little sad that I just couldn't enjoy those things - but the steak was delicious and it made me a very happy pregnant lady.

In other news, we threw Ronnie a "potty party" last weekend, which was a total DISASTER! After reading dozens of success stories online, I was geared up and ready to go. After Ronnie woke up, we fed him a quick breakfast and then showed him to the party - in the bathroom.

I included underwear, balloons, books, his womb-bear with undies on, and some inspirational pictures. No, my two year-old can't read, but once I read it to him, he knew what the signs meant and it was fun talking about the colors and the letters. Ronnie actually sat on the potty really well. He seemed to enjoy the experience and didn't want to get up at one point, matter-of-factly ordering me to read him more books. We took him in there every 15 minutes and had him sit until he was ready to get up. Then, we'd set the timer for another 15 minutes and do it all over again. I thought for sure we would HAVE to catch him when he had to pee. To speed things along, I offered lots of juice and popsicles, which is heaven to a toddler at 8:00am, let me tell you! Unfortunately, he kept peeing in between the potty sessions - all over the kitchen floor. Later in the day, we caught him trying to cheat and add stickers to his potty success chart. That makes me chuckle a little. :) But he didn't go in the potty once the whole day. So, we decided to table the matter for a while. I guess he's just not ready yet (even though we thought he was because he's been taking off his poopy pull-ups at nap time and walking around his room - not fun to clean up). Every now and then, we ask him if he has to go to the potty, but we haven't pressured him at all.

Baby Junk

2010-07-18T18:13:00.000-07:00

From the moment I found out about our little bun in the oven, I started thinking about what I'm going to do differently and what I'll do exactly the same as my first baby. Since I'm currently on my minimalist kick, I know for sure that I won't be buying a bunch of junk I don't need.

Ronnie had a TON of crap. And I mean crap. I had everything from a million bottles to 4 different shopping cart covers to 2 bouncers, a swing, a jumparoo, and a dining room so full of toys that I had to move my table out. Some things worked and some things didn't. It was a gamble every time I bought something new, and more often than not, it was a waste of money. I did get good deals on this crap due to yard sales, freecycle, and craigslist, however, I still spent more money on baby gear than was necessary.

This time, I'm taking a whole new approach. I don't expect a baby shower this time around and, really, I'd feel guilty having another one. Family and friends came out of the wood works three years ago to shower us with very generous gifts. It just wouldn't be right to ask for more. That means we're going to have to purchase everything on our own this time - why not make it as simple as possible?

Luckily, I was able to keep some of the big-ticket and sentimental items from Ronnie's baby days.

A convertible crib. Right now, Ronnie is still using this crib as a toddler bed, but I figure that a big boy bed would be a perfect Christmas gift this year. Then, Ronnie could pass his crib down to his little brother or sister.
A pack-n-play with bassinet and changing table. While I actually love the idea of this, it was too big to move around from room to room. I had it in our room for the first 6 months of Ronnie's life so he could sleep next to me. It wasn't too convenient, though, when I had to sit up and reach over the side to pat his back. What was convenient was the fact that it would break down and we could take it on vacation or outside with us. Its definitely something I'm keeping around and I'm sure we'll get a ton of use out of it for the new baby.
Boppy. What baby doesn't have a boppy these days? I used this from the moment Ronnie was born till he could sit up on his own. Its so convenient for feedings and as a little prop for naps (under supervision!).
Sleepers, Onsies, and Baby Clothes. If we have another boy, we're set on clothes. I had some of the most adorable stuff for Ronnie! Some of it will even work for a girl, too.
Graco Infant Seat and Stroller Set. It was definitely a pain in the butt trying to find a place to store this, but I'm super glad that I'm not going to have to shell out another $180 for this baby essential.
Sheets, Blankets & Baby Toys. I kept a few of my favorite blankets, like the one we brought Ronnie home from the hospital in and the two that his great-grandma croched for him. I think a few is really enough to keep the new baby swaddled and warm. We still use all the same sheets and comforters on Ronnie's toddler bed that we used in his crib. I'm sure these will just get passed down as well.

So, that's a good start, but babies need a little more loot than that. Here's what I'm thinking:

Super minimalist Puj Bath Tub ($39.99). I actually went through 3 different baby tubs with Ronnie and hated every one of them. My problem came when bath time was over and it was time for my shower. I had to move and shuffle the tub around the bathroom when I needed the space. Its so not convenient. This little Puj tub is made out of foam and bends into place to support baby in any bathroom sink. When you're done bathing, it hangs flat on the bathroom door. Super amazing and its got my vote. I can't wait to try it.
Organic Moby Wrap ($59.95). From what I've read, this is the ultimate in baby-wearing for plus-sized moms. At a 40DDD bust size, the little Hotsling I used with Ronnie was so uncomfortable that I couldn't take more than 30 minutes of it. I'm hoping to be able to try this one out. The ergonomical design definitely appeals to me since I've had a bout with sciatica for the past 6 months. I definitely want to do more of the attachment parenting style with this one. I ventured into the arena with Ronnie, but it was next to impossible because I ran a 24-hour FCC home nursery with 3 other babies at any given time and my husband was deployed. I was able to hold Ronnie all night long, but not much more.
Arms Reach Mini Convertible Natural Co-Sleeper ($189.99). This goes along with what I was saying earlier regarding the pack-n-play. I kept it right by my bed so Ronnie could sleep next to me, but he often times ended up in the bed with me because I couldn't reach him while I was laying down. With a co-sleeper, the new baby could be sleeping in the bassinet while I still have access to him/her. I love this idea because this particular one serves as a co-sleeper, bassinet, play pen, and changing table - all in one! We'll also be able to move it around from room to room as often as we need because of its small size. Even if the baby is napping in the bassinet, I can have him/her close to me. I like that. Its definitely the big ticket item, but I think it will be worth it.
American Red Cross Health Care Kit ($13.65). While this is something that I actually still have and use from Ronnie's baby days, I think it would be appropriate to buy the new baby his/her own.
Huggies Pure & Natural Diapers. I'd love to be the ultra eco-friendly mommy and use cloth diapers, but I'll be honest and say that I just don't have the balls for it. I actually bought a set for Ronnie at one point and got scared before I even opened the package. I ended up sending them back for a refund. I use these Huggies Pure & Natural diapers for Ronnie's nights now, so I expect to use the same for the new baby. Who knows though, baby might decide he/she wants something else and I'll have to find an alternative.
Dr. Brown's Natural Flow 4oz Wide Neck Bottles -BPA Free ($9.99 for a set of two). My plan is to breast feed, but as I found out with my first, the baby doesn't always stick to your plan. Pumping for the first month just to give him breast milk was exhausting, so I'm hoping this one with latch on quick. With Ronnie, I had more bottles than I could keep up with. The top rack of my dishwasher stayed full with bottles. A friend of mine, who had her baby a few months after me, totally opened my eyes when I found out she only used one bottle - ever. She'd feed the baby, wash the bottle, and use it again. Genius! It sounds so simple, yet most new moms stock up on tons and tons to make sure we "have enough." When the bottle got grimey from the wear and tear, she'd toss it and buy another one. I guarantee she spent HUNDREDS less on bottles than I did. I plan to take this simplistic approach this time around. It will also protect me against having to change brands. With Ronnie, I was dead-set on using the Platex bottles. Of course, I spent a ton and a few sets of them only to find out that Ronnie had reflux and I needed to use the Dr. Brown's instead. This time around, I'll only have to replace two bottles instead of twenty if that happens.
Bumbo Baby Seat ($41.49), I can not say enough good things about the Bumbo seat! I wish I had kept ours because these do come out pretty pricey, but I needed the space. Plus, I figured if my mom could snag one at the thrift store for $10 once, she could do it again. This Bumbo seat worked wonders for keeping Ronnie in place and helping him to learn how to sit up. I also used it as a feeding chair until he got too big for it and had to move up to a booster seat. I'll definitely get another one for the new baby.
Clothes, Bibs, Burp Cloths, and Wash Cloths. These are all pretty standard things, but I plan to keep it to a minimum and stay within a natural color palette. These are the items that you can't really plan for because I know I'll walk into baby gap and fall in love with the sleeper on sale and buy it. Its just going to happen that way.

So, I've known that I'm pregnant for all of 3 days and I've already got it all mapped out. How neurotic am I? I guess I just need something to plan. I'm a HUGE planner; I like to know everything about everything before it happens. With our upcoming move, I can't plan a lick. Being able to do this is helping to tie up all that nervous energy!

Magical

2010-07-16T18:44:00.000-07:00

Those two little pink lines are magical, aren't they? We got quite the surprise last night as you can tell. Living with PCOS, I know that my chances of conceiving are lower than the average woman, so when I get the feeling that I could be experiencing pregnancy symptoms, I usually have to talk myself down and remind myself that I could be getting excited for no reason. I held out long enough. This is the first pregnancy test I have taken since Rob returned from deployment about this time last year and it was a big fat POSITIVE!

How did I know?

Nausea
Fatigue
Tender (and enlarged, if that was ever possible) breasts
Craving for Spaghettios - I actually hate them
And odd interest in all the new baby stuff online. I actually entered a giveaway for a minimal modern baby swing at Project Nursery a couple of weeks ago. I had no clue I was pregnant at that point - I just wanted the swing.

What awful timing, right? In just over 2 months, Rob and I will be moving back home (with a ditty move, no less), homeless, jobless, and without a concrete plan. ETS-ing from the Army isn't going to be easy. There's a lot of unanswered questions that just aren't possible to answer right now. So why am I not freaking out right now?

This didn't happen on our time, it happened on God's time. Let me explain. I haven't been on birth control in years. For one, I hate what it does to my body (cramps, irritability, fatigue, and more fatigue). I also didn't want to try to control a pregnancy and in return end up not being able to have another one at all. Yes, BC does really affect your fertility. Knowing the fertility issues I already have, I feel like birth control is a silver bullet that would diminish my chance to none when we were ready. So, basically, I could have gotten pregnant much sooner than I did - if God had it in his plan that way.

This is not a planned pregnancy, but we both knew it could happen. And we both have faith that God wouldn't give us more than we could handle. It will totally work out and I am super thrilled that we have been gifted with another miracle!

I ended up going to the ER this morning because I have been cramping for days. I thought maybe I was just about to start my cycle, but when I found out I was actually pregnant, I got a little worried. I called the appointment line to try to get something soon and they told me to go straight to the ER. When a hospital tells you to go to the ER, you listen. I got Ronnie squared away with Rob (glad he came home early today) and headed up there. They, of course, gave me a pregnancy test and it was, to my relief, still positive. They then checked my hormone levels and told me that I have a 170 hCG, which means that I'm about 4 weeks along. That gives me a due date of around March 22. I know this will change though. My due date changed a few times with Ronnie as he grew and they measured him more accurately. I still have to go back in on Monday to get my levels checked again (should have more than doubled by then), but the doctor said that everything else seemed fine. She attributed the cramps to "implanting" - when the egg is attaching itself to the uterine wall. I researched it online and apparently its normal. I don't remember it with Ronnie, but that's basically because I didn't know until a little further along. As a matter of fact, next month it will have been 3 years since I got Ronnie's positive test. How ironic is that!?

On Minimalism

2010-07-11T18:41:00.000-07:00

Did you notice my new look?

I've mentioned before how I love minimalism. I've been making many drastic changes around my home to become more of a minimalist and so now I wanted to clean up my blog to reflect the same principles. Since I last set some minimalist goals back in May, I have accomplished quite a bit:

I've made at least 8 trips to Goodwill with bags and bags of goodies we don't need anymore.
I've brought my wardrobe down to half of what it was (and I'm about to go purge some more).
I've decluttered Ronnie's room, getting rid of a ton of baby clothes and about 50% of his toys. He's still got more than I want him to have, but it was very hard saying goodbye to what we already did.
I've brought all my paperwork down to one drawer in a file cabinet. Along with this, I've scanned some paperwork to go digital and I've moved all my bills over to paperless. I am no longer keeping track of my clients and projects on paper as electronic files serve me just fine.
I've purged my laundry room of cleaning products that we no longer or will never use.
I've gone through my kitchen cabinets and stripped my supplies down to almost bare bones. I love how organized it all is now that I have the space to spread out what I kept.
I've removed everything from the walls in the living room/dining room and kitchen. I do plan to put just a couple of things back up, but I'm waiting until we move in October.
I stripped down my desktop, removing all shortcut icons and cleaning up my files.
I purged the bathroom cabinets of old products and stuff we don't use. My bathroom space is very limited, so this is still cluttered. I'm hoping to pare it down more soon.
I stopped saving bookmarks to my firefox tool bar and started using pinterest.com.
I purged our art closet, leaving a ton of new floor space.
I purged about half of what we had in the storage shed. In May, I suggested that I could purge enough stuff to warrant getting rid of the unit altogether. About a week into the process, I realized that we won't be able to get rid of it anyway because of my husband's rather large tool chest. There's absolutely no space for it in our small apartment, and I couldn't ask him to get rid of these very expensive tools from his machining days. When we finally do have a home of our own, I'm going to want him to have those around for building stuff!

The road to minimalism is definitely a long one, but I'm getting there. There's still quite a bit I'm working on, like:

Stop buying unnecessary things - this is so hard to do! I need to shop less so I can save up for some of the bigger-ticket items I want, like a new couch or some nice art. We also still have a car note and a student loan to pay off. Not to mention the fact that we're about to be unemployed in a few months! Sheesh!
Eat less, using fewer ingredients. I've been making a step in the right direction on this one, but I'm not quite there. I'd love for my family to be eating simpler, healthier foods using 5 ingredients or less by the end of the summer.

Vingt Cinq

2010-07-08T22:29:00.000-07:00

[source]

Its official. Its 1:00am on July 9, 2010 and I am now a quarter of a century old. I don't really think 25 is old, but I feel old. How many times can I use the word "old" in this post? Old. Old. Old.

Why do I feel old?

I have little tolerance for loud music. This could be in part due to noisy neighbors and just being fed up with it, but I can't even explain the annoying twinge that shoots from the crown of my head to the tips of my toes when I get out at a gas station only to find that the person beside me is blasting an incoherent mix of bass and "nigga, bitch, damn, nigga".
I'm not only a hater of rap these days (I actually do like some rap anyway). I've pretty much gotten to the point that I won't even turn on the country music station anymore. I swear every single song is about how country this person or that person is because they gather up in a field, drink beer, and act like idiots. I also have a real hard time with the song that says something to the effect of "working hard all week puts beer on the table". What happened to values in country music?
As you can tell from my disgust in music lately, I have no interest in the party life anymore. I can't really say I was ever a big party girl, but my desire to get together with idiotic friends to kill 12 bottles of liquor and destroy someone's house (usually mine) has completely died.
I seriously have a bad case of sciatica and sometimes when I get up from a sitting position, I have to hunch over or else it hurts like hell. This is no joke. Its awful.
My every thought has turned to my family. I just don't care about the same things anymore. I'm not saying this is a bad thing, though. I am so incredibly in love with this little boy named Ronnie. Oh, and the husband, too, of course. My complete purpose is to be there for them and I love it.

I would have never thought that 25 would be such a hard year to take. Ever since I can remember, as soon as July 1 hit, the only thing I could think about was my birthday. This year, I've actually tried to put it out of my mind. Now, its here and I find myself sitting in front of the computer crying. Its sad and its happy. You spend your entire teen and young adult life impatiently trying to get your life started. My life has arrived and I am so happy with it. The sad part is that the anticipation is over with. Yes, I still have great things to come in the future, but time is already going so fast now that I just want to stop enjoy this moment - right now - right here. I'm not anticipating the future so much because I know its coming and I don't want to waste my time trying to get there all the while letting right now pass me by.

My amazing husband wrestled his way into taking CQ (24 hour duty) tonight so that he can have the entire day off for my birthday. How sweet is that? He told me we could do whatever I wanted. I've been thinking for two days and here's what I've come up with:

get Ronnie new shoes (poor thing's toes are right at the tip - they grow so fast!)
get the water table umbrella out of the ditch
take junk to goodwill
Cheesecake Factory

Haha! If that's not the saddest birthday list ever, I don't know what is. At least I thought of the Cheesecake Factory. Yummy...

Thank you, Lord, for giving me another year of life. I have been so blessed and can only hope that you will continue to bless me and my family in however many years to come.

The End So Soon?

2010-07-06T07:12:00.000-07:00

Alas, we made it 5 days before dear ol' hubby decided that my 50s Housewife Experiment was annoying. Since the entire experiment was created in order to please my husband, I'm afraid I'm going to have to cut it off here. What did I learn?

Its not easy being a 50s housewife to a soldier (or any man that works crazy unpredictable hours). The entire goal of a housewife's day was to prepare for the arrival of her husband. When he's gone for 4 days and then home for 4 days, there's only 1 arrival in that entire period. My progress certainly didn't look effortless to him since he was home to see it all happen.
I love the way my house feels clean and its not so hard to maintain it, if I'm in the right mindset. My house used to be spic and span constantly, but I think I got discouraged over time with the wear and tear of being a stay-at-home-mom with a toddler. I think these 5 days jump-started a new routine for me. I hope I'm able to keep the momentum going.
Getting dressed with hair and makeup every day is not as daunting as I once thought. Its really easy to push that to the side when you know you're staying home with a baby who doesn't care how you look all day. Then that turns into never doing it anymore. I have discovered the importance of beautifying for myself, even if no one else is looking. It made me feel pretty, feminine, and dainty. Heck, I even finally have a picture of MYSELF that I actually like on facebook now. That hasn't happened for a while.
We certainly didn't save any money. When Rob is happier with me, because of my taking a huge interest in what makes him happy, he is more willing to come up with last-minute plans and take us out to do something. Everything we did over the past 5 days (with the exception of the BBQ) was Rob's idea. He's usually the one sitting around and waiting for me to suggest something so he can say no. I'm so proud of him for actually coming up with stuff he wants to do on his own - and it was something we could all enjoy.
I really like the music and TV from the 50s. At first, it just started as a way to boost up my motivation and inspiration, but I really like it. Especially the early 50s music like Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby, Tony Bennet, and Elvis Presley. I have become enamored by the Cleaver family in "Leave it Beaver". I think I'm addicted now. I love to see how the family solves all their little problems. June Cleaver certainly wasn't a doormat for her husband, but she was an incredible mother and wife - something I think I'll strive towards.

Days 3 & 4: What a Fun Weekend

2010-07-05T05:29:00.000-07:00

Well, something is working because we had a great weekend! I woke up Saturday morning, got dressed, hair and makeup, and cooked breakfast. While I was cleaning up from breakfast, Rob skyped his mom (like a usual Saturday). During the conversation, he brought up how much Ronnie likes cars and somehow that turned into "we should go go-karting". The next thing I knew, we were on our way to Louisville (because there's nothing fun like that around here). There was one little snag at this point. We had almost arrived at the place but needed to make a u-turn to get there. The light was taking forever to turn green for us. Rob got a little impatient and started trying to get back over into the straight lane to make a u-turn further down. I thought that if we waited a little bit longer, the light would turn, and unlike a good 50s housewife, I said "don't do it - just wait!" That made matters worse and he stepped on the gas to get over and didn't let off of it. It scared the hell out of me. I hate when he does that and the car makes that nascar noise. That's when he proceeded to throw his hands up in the air and scream at me. I told him to pull the car over and I took over driving. I don't think that would have happened in the 50s. The wife would have just shut up and let him do what he thought was best. But, that was all instinct. When we finally got to the place, we realized we still had 30 minutes before it opened, so we opted to go get some lunch. Ronnie decided that Woody needed a sip of his lemonade:

Finally, to the go-karts:

Ronnie had a blast and I was so proud of Rob for coming up with a fun activity for us to do. We hit the arcade before we left and then got back on the road towards home. On the way back, Rob and I had a great conversation about anything and everything. Usually, we would just spend the whole time pissing each other off back and forth. But this time, it was different. It seems as though while I'm trying to be nicer, calmer, and more understanding towards him, he's actually reciprocating the same things.

Sunday was the 4th of July and, since the barbecue became popular in the 50s, I felt like we had to do one. Unfortunately, our family lives 9 hours away and my friends happen to be married to my husband's superiors, so it would have been inappropriate to invite them over. So, it was just us. That's okay though, I did it up anyway.

The first thing we had to do was clean the backyard (if you can call it that). I figured this could be my cleaning task for the day.

Before:

We ended up getting rid of a lot of that junk - old flower pots with dead tomatoes in them, old toys that Ronnie's too old for, and some painting supplies from a recent DIY scheme. In the midst of it all, we found dozens of grass spiders, which are fairly large and scary. Not exactly poisonous, but I still don't like spiders. We ended up spraying the outside of our apartment with some bug guard stuff, which made more spiders come out, which we quickly squished with the broom.

Here's the finished product:

And now for the festivities:

And then inside:

Kinda Sucky on Day 2

2010-07-02T18:43:00.000-07:00

I was most certainly not such a good 50s housewife today. After the stress of the day, I needed a good cocktail (i.e. Mike's Hard Lemonade in a martini glass). I sat, sipped, and watched Leave it to Beaver to get my inspiration back.

Although, the day did start off well. Because I forced myself to bed early last night (10:30), I miraculously woke up at 6:30 on my own. That's 30 minutes before my alarm was scheduled to go off. I decided to take advantage of the extra time so I headed straight for the computer to update my blog (for day 1). After updating the blog, checking emails, and checking up on a design contest I entered, I headed for the kitchen. I whipped up sour cream banana pancakes, sausage, and fried eggs. While cooking, I was shooting back and forth to the bathroom to do my hair and makeup and then around the house to tidy up before the hubby woke. Breakfast was ready and I gently nudged Rob to wake up. We all sat down to a very yummy and happy breakfast.

I kind of had to spill the beans today since Rob figured it out. I'm not sure how yet, but he did. He said something to the effect of "is this just an experiment you're doing - like I'm going to act like this for 20 days". I know he hadn't seen my blog so it amazes me that he knew. I told him all about it and even let him read what I've written for the past few days.

I asked Rob what his plans were for the day and he suggested that we go to Lowe's to check out the materials and tools we'll need to build my parson's desk. I really just think he wanted to look at the air compressors - and building a desk is a good excuse to get one. :) So after we were done, I cleaned up the dishes, made a dash through the house, and got Ronnie and I dressed to go. We had an excellent time at Lowe's. Usually, Rob gets upset because apparently I "act" like I know more than him. I'm sorry, but if I know that the lumber section is on the far left end of the store and you start walking right, I should say something right? Not today. I fed my man's ego and acted like the dainty woman that I am (at least for this month). We got through the store without a single fight. And it wasn't THAT hard to just let things go. It only stung a little.

As we were leaving Lowe's Rob asked what we should do next. Knowing that I couldn't spend money on my own accord, it was pointless to pick out a place I wanted to go, so I just said "whatever you want to do hunny". Then I mentioned that we should probably get home soon so that Ronnie could have lunch. It was already noon. He said, "didn't they go out to eat in the 50s?" lol. We ended up at Tumbleweed, where lunch was absolutely amazing. Ronnie behaved well and everything was still easy sailing at this point.

When we got home, we put Ronnie down for a nap and I headed out to the store to pick up some milk. I'm being frugal this week and skipping the grocery shopping to stretch our food. We should have plenty in the cabinets to make a full week, but we still needed milk. I made the mistake of calling my brother on the way to Walmart to see how he was doing. Long story short - there's a lot of family drama surrounding my brother. I was trying to be a loving sister and talk to him about it when his girlfriend grabbed the phone and said that he's done with his family and since he's living with her now, she doesn't want him talking to me. "Click" is the worst possible thing you can do to me. And I'm super sensitive when it comes to my family. I immediately started sobbing. I ended up calling both my parents and my sister to cool down. After a good cry-session, I finally got in the store and picked up the milk and a few other incidentals I came to get.

I get home and my brother calls me back to apologize and talk some more. That was another long conversation that ended with him saying "I'm trying to take responsibility for my mistakes, but everyone is telling me that my problems are my fault." I mean, duh. I had to explain to him that he's an adult now (although he made that transition in prison) and that his life is a result of the choices he has made and will make.

I worry so much about my brother - about all my siblings, really. I just wish he would listen and grow up. I just couldn't get him off my mind today. I've read that the women of the 40s, 50s, 60s tried to avoid stress so that they always looked "refreshed" and happy for their husbands. Its the stress that makes me not want to wash another sink full of dishes, but to veg in front of the computer watching "Hell's Kitchen". Even though I wanted to, I didn't. But it sure didn't make it easy to get everything done today.

Here's what I actually accomplished:

Aired out and made the beds.
Wiped down both of the bathrooms.
Washed, dried, and folded Rob's uniform and 1 more load of laundry.
Washed the dishes 3 times (breakfast, supper prep, and after supper).
Wiped down the counters and appliances.
Took out the garbage.
Swept the kitchen floor.
Organized recipes.
Tidied frequently throughout the day.
Shaved my legs.

A far cry from yesterday, huh? I did manage to make this amazing Penne Frittata with Basil and Ricotta [recipe from Sunday Suppers] and Waldorf salad. Rob didn't like it too much, but I thought it was yummy. He said that he's tired of having "healthy" meals. lol!

Well, its 15 minutes till bedtime. The house is still clean and I've got curlers in my hair. Lets hope for a happier day tomorrow. :)

Day 1 in Full Swing

2010-07-02T05:24:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the first official day of my 50s Housewife Experiment. Rob had been in the field for 4 days (warning to anyone thinking about marrying a soldier - they leave for work one day and you end up not seeing them for a whole week - unexpectedly).

Since he wasn't home in the morning to go to work, I didn't have to get up so early. I woke about 7:00 - just enough time to get myself dressed, exercised, and beautified for the day before Ronnie woke up. In 50s housewife fashion, I put curlers in my hair the night before and slept in it. I actually REALLY like the way it turned out. For Dollar Tree curlers, those things worked well. For makeup, I went natural but went heavy on the eyeliner up top.

Once I was all dressed, it was time to start cleaning. Here's what I accomplished today (on top of toddler meals, nap time, and playing trucks several times throughout the day).

Rob's top priority room is our bedroom. It looks awful because we haven't decorated it yet, but at least its clean now. The first thing I did was throw back the covers and opened the windows to air it out, just like they did in the 50s. In fact, I opened the windows in the whole house because today was such a beautiful day. I tidied up, vacuumed, cleaned out from under the bed, and made the bed.

Next up was Ronnie's room. Okay, I know that no matter how hard I try, his room is never going to stay clean. I didn't even take a picture because it was already a mess by the time I got around to it. I did, however, go through all of his baby clothes that were clogging up the dresser. For some reason, Rob just couldn't understand that the clothes in the top drawer didn't fit him anymore. He would always grab something that was too small. Problem solved - I took those clothes in the top drawer and the huge bucket I had stored in the closet and pared them down into one nice little container. I think Ronnie thought I was a little weird every time I saw one of his newborn outfits and squealed. If anything can put you in the mood to have another baby - that can. Anyhow, I ended up with half a huge rubbermaid container full of clothes to take to Goodwill. That got me thinking about my clothes - so I popped back into my room and finished off the container with stuff I can't/don't wear.

Now, we're moving on to the bathrooms. I managed to clean out the cabinets, organizing all my stuff that Rob complains about constantly.

Then I tidied up the surfaces and floors and went on to scrubbing the tubs, toilets, and sinks. Then I cleared the drains since they've been going slow. To finish it off, I swept and mopped both bathrooms.

In the living room/dining room area, I tidied up, dusted, vacuumed, and washed the walls, baseboards, and doors.

And by noon, the table was set for supper.

I certainly spent more time in the kitchen than any other room in the house. This one deserves a list:

Hand washed dishes 5 times. I have to say that I actually like hand washing the dishes. Its not that much more work and I don't have to wait for a whole load for the dishes to get clean.
Swept the floors 3 times.
Mopped twice.
Wiped the counters and appliances.
Scrubbed the stove.
Cleaned out the cabinet underneath the sink.
Cleaned out the fridge.
Took out the garbage twice (because I had enough after cleaning all that).
Printed and framed this adorable menu planner.

And as Tony Bennet sang "Fly me to the moon" on the "radio" (aka Pandora), I whipped up an apple crumble pie for dessert. which was quite delicious to my surprise.

On top of all that, I managed to wash and fold 4 loads of laundry and clean off the top of my dryer, which happens to be the catch-all for everything.

So what lesson have I learned today?

Its totally possible to get everything done in one day. In fact, I was done around noon and spent the rest of the day watching Leave It to Beaver and giving myself a manicure. What I didn't have time for was work. Well, I had the time, but not the motivation or inspiration. I just couldn't get in to the mindset.

Do I want to do this everyday? NO, but I am going to anyway for the next month.

15 minutes before Rob returned home from work (finally), I freshened up my makeup and hair and changed into a skirt. I tried to greet him at the door, but I didn't know when he was going to be home because he never called me, like I asked. I had supper on the table by 5:00 and did the dishes immediately after. I set up Rob's computer for him on my desk (mostly so I could set the table for breakfast, but I also knew I wouldn't be on it for the night). That's when he got suspicious. "Have you been smoking pot?" he asked. I died laughing, which made matters worse because now my eyes were bloodshot from the tears that came with the laughter. Just to inform you, I have never smoked pot a day in my life. He was very curious to know why I was being so nice to him. I just simply replied "I just want to be nice to you." Throughout the entire night, I never complained once. I let him tell me about his day and only said anything about mine when he asked. I never once contradicted him (which I have a habit of doing just-'cause). I smiled and hugged him and laughed at almost everything he said. I actually really enjoyed it. Once I put myself in the mindset, I was really happy and acted as though I truly madly deeply loved him and respected him like I do.

It was a happy and exciting first day. Lets see what day 2 brings.

50s On Hold

2010-06-28T05:25:00.000-07:00

It looks as though my husband has been sent out to a field exercise for the next 3 days, so my 30 Days Experiment to live like a 1950s housewife will resume on Thursday, which happens to be the first of July so it kind of works out. I will be able to make the entire month of July 50s month!

Since a 50s housewife was mostly concerned with preparing for her husband's arrival each day, there won't be much point to busting my butt without him coming home. Although, these three days will give me a little more time to research the decade more and prepare myself for the long haul.

Before we knew about the training, I actually was going through with it. "The mister" had to be at work at 4:00am this morning so that meant I had to be up at 2:45 (after fighting with a two-year old to go to bed till midnight). I actually did it. This is me "perky" at 3am. I am well aware I look like crap though. I'm going to have to work on that "refreshed" thing. I got up, got dressed, did my hair and makeup (well, straightened my hair and applied foundation, mascara, and lip gloss), brushed my teeth, and made his coffee. He set up the coffee pot last night, so all I had to do was push the button - kind of a cheat, I know. But he didn't know I'd be doing this. The fun part is the fact that I didn't tell him anything. I'm just doing it. When he heard me pouring his coffee, he peeked into the kitchen and said, "Hey, why are you drinking my coffee?" I just smiled and said. "Its for you silly. Do you want cream and sugar or just black?" Most of my morning was just standing around waiting for him to leave. I had to bite my tongue twice. Normally, I would have said something about throwing all the clothes from the dryer on the laundry room floor, but a good 50s housewife never complains, right? After he left, it was back to bed till 5:00 but then I got a call from him saying he wasn't going to be home so the experiment was put on hold.

Got any ideas or suggestions for me? How about a blog I should read regarding retro housewives? Please share - I can take all the help I can get!

A Thirty Days Experiment: 50s Month

2010-06-27T15:59:00.000-07:00

So, if you read my blog, you'll see that yesterday was not a good day. I was upset with dear ol' hubby and blabbed about it for the world to see. Even though I was mad, I still took to heart the things he was saying and really tried to understand why I don't have the motivation to be the wife he wants me to be. After all, if I want him to give me what I need (i.e. emotional support, interest in my hobbies, etc.), I need to be able to accept and comply with the things he needs from me. I want to be the wife he needs, but I need the motivation. I know you're just dying to ask yourself, "so, how does Shay find motivation?" Why, by going all-out and over-the-top, of course!

I've developed a recent fascination with a little show called 30 Days on FX. In this show Morgan Spurlock (the mastermind behind Supersize Me) puts willing participants up to a 30-day challenge. Sometimes, Morgan even participates in the challenge himself. I find these the most interesting. Like when he and his fiance spent a month living on minimum wage. They lived in a crap apartment and ate beans for supper but they still didn't have enough money at the end of the month. Another close favorite was when he spent 30 days in prison. That one kind of hit close to home since my brother was just released from prison after serving 5 years (actually sentenced 18, can you imagine?). He's had a mom spend a month binge-drinking, spent a month on an Indian reservation himself, and put two city-dwelling friends on an "off-the-grid" community (commune). Believe me, its more than interesting. So, I thought, why don't I do my own 30 days experiment?

Goal: For the next 30 days, I will be living the life of a 1950s housewife.

Why? Well, for one, it just sounds interesting, doesn't it? My husband's main concerns yesterday were that I don't get everything done around the house and I'm not such a pleasure to look at with ratty hair and his basketball shorts on. I can't disagree with him. Just because I'm a housewife doesn't mean I have to be all frumpy about it. I've been taking the easy way out and maybe this little extreme challenge is just what I need to kick my butt into gear.

Apparently, reverting back to the retro-housewife days has become a fad, especially in the UK. Its a little freaky, but I found it helpful in researching what I'm going to have to do. Joanne Massey and her husband have actually taken it so seriously that they dress, decorate, eat, and even watch TV from the 50s. Another great resource was a community of Time Warp Wives that features wives "living" in different decades.

Let me be clear - this is just an experiment for me. I do not - absolutely do not - plan to make this a permanent life change. However, I do hope to maybe take away a few good habits and really get to the bottom of what pleases my husband. I am neither a feminist nor anti-feminist. I believe that women should have the right to celebrate their gender however they choose to. This month, I choose to be June Cleaver.

So, what does it mean to live like a 50s housewife? Well, lets start with a little graphic, claimed to be published by Housekeeping Monthly in 1955. It looks there is some speculation as to whether it is actually a true document, though, because there's some proof out there that it was actually a piece of propaganda released on college campuses during the 70s (feminist movement?). Even so, I actually find most of these points to probably be accurate of a wife during that time, so its what I will base my experiment on.

Another great resource I'll be using is Jen's blog. She did a similar experiment for two weeks last month.

Let's break it down into what I will and will not be doing:

Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This won't be too much of a departure from what we currently do. However, I won't be making him set the table and I'll make a concerted effort to have a full meal with dessert every night. I don't plan on making traditional 50s meals, though, since my family's nutrition is of great importance to me. Have you seen the stuff they ate back then?
I will follow the daily routine of a 50s housewife based upon what I have found online and in books from that era. This is an extreme amount of cleaning, so I expect that my house will be nice and shiny once the month is over.
The other major part of a housewife's day was self care and beauty regiments. This will include dressing to the nine's first thing in the morning, freshening up throughout the day, and completing weekly beauty routines each day (like facials, pedicures, manicures, shaving, and hair care).
I will practice frugality within an inch of my life. According to what I've read, a good housewife would never spend money without her husband's suggestion. The only things I should be purchasing are groceries, household products, and diapers. If anything else is bought, it will be my husband's suggestion and decision to do so. I can make it through 30 days without shopping, right? To take this a step further, 50s women didn't use plastic. I'll need to go to the bank and take out cash each time I go grocery shopping. Maybe this will help me stick within my budget as well.
During the month, I won't be able to use my microwave or dishwasher. These luxuries weren't around during this decade. I'll be washing all my dishes by hand and cooking everything with my stove and oven.
50s housewives didn't work, but that's something I'm just going to have to get around. Like Jen, I'll be claiming my work time as "volunteering at the red cross." Although, I am bringing my hours way down and I'll have to stick to a regular schedule, now posted at dumplindesignstudio.com.
I plan on making myself more graceful and feminine. No more baggy sweat pants and big t-shirts to hang around the house in. I'll get dressed first thing in the morning into something decent enough to wear in front of nice company and then changing into a dress/skirt for each evening. Some things I won't be doing: pointy bras, girdle, panty hose (ick! never!), and curled bangs. This means Ronnie has to get dressed every morning as well - no more all-day pj's!

What do I plan to accomplish? At the end of my 30 Days Experiment, I'll be able to evaluate a few things:

Is my husband happier? If the answer is yes, then I need to make a more concerted effort to do more around the house and keep myself pretty for him. If not, something else is going on and there was nothing wrong with me in the first place.
Did we save any money? By not using my luxury appliances and dedicating myself to be as frugal as possible, I expect that we'll come out ahead. I'll be able to compare our spending during this coming month to the average of the past few months and see what results we get.
Do I feel better? One of the benefits of cleaning all day will be extra calorie burn. Taking that into consideration along with the extra time spent on my looks (which is 100% more than I spend now), how will I feel as a woman?
Is our home more inviting and peaceful? Will all the extra time spent cleaning actually improve our home life?

I'll be chronicling my days as a 50s housewife right here, so stay tuned to discover how it all turns out!

This is an "I'm Sick of My Husband" Post

2010-06-26T11:44:00.000-07:00

Why is it that the people we love the most drive us so crazy? Seriously, I've about had it. I tried to let it out and tell him, but that just turned into a big pissed-off fight about who has it worse and how I don't do anything he wants me to do.

Seriously, anyone who knows me can tell you that I bust my butt to clean my house, cook my family good meals, come up with meaningful experiences, and plan the heck out of any special occasion.

Rarely is my house ever really clean, but that's because I have a two year old who hasn't learned to pick up after himself and drains every bit of life out of me so that at the end of the day, I just want to sit down. That being said, my house is clean at some point throughout everyday. It just doesn't stay that way. And I have a hard time remembering to make the bed and fold the laundry (probably because I hate to do these things). But apparently, these are the most important parts of cleaning to dear ol' hubby. Forget about the germs on the counters, the scum in the tubs, the spills on the floor, and the toys everywhere.

Anyhow, that's not even what I was frustrated about from the get-go. I really feel like my husband doesn't know ME or care to know ME. He gets annoyed every single time I sit in front of the computer. Designing is my passion. When I have a free moment, that's what I like to do. Kinda like someone I know who could literally sit in front of a computer playing video games for 3 days straight. Believe me, he's done it - and I joined him because I love him and took an interest in what he enjoyed. All he sees is me neglecting my responsibilities, like making the freakin' bed. Totally forget the fact that I actually make a little money doing what I love to do.

Besides that, he has no interest in trying out things that I'd like to do. I find all kinds of neat ideas online from the millions of blogs I come across. But everything I bring up is stupid, "too much", over the top, ridiculous, just not something he likes to do. You know what he likes to do?

Sleep
Play video games
Eat anything with a ridiculous amount of cheese on it
Ride my ass about how I'm not doing what he wants me to

I have to admit that he has stepped up from time to time and has really helped me out around the house. But those moments are far and few between. The things I really need his help with, like taking stuff to storage, cleaning the cars, cleaning up the backyard and porch from all the spider webs, fixing things, he refuses to do. His methodology is that if I want it done, then its my problem and I should have to deal with it. Boy, the earth would cave in if I turned that one around on him.

Right now, he's pissed off that I'm sitting at the computer writing this (while Ronnie is napping and I have a moment to think, mind you). He's never once seen my blog. He's never once taken a look at any website I have created. Maybe if he did, he's have a better an understanding of who I am because this is how I express myself.

Another thing, which is kind of the icing on the cake in this little bitch-fest, is that he has no consideration for my feelings. I'm not necessarily speaking of him hurting my feelings, but rather his lack of comforting me when someone else hurts me. Last week, someone was at my parents house when I called to see how my brother's graduation ceremony went. This someone went to high school with me and has become best buddies with my parents, mind you. A little weird? Yes. While I was talking to my brother, apparently, this someone made a comment about how I talk to much. My feelings were so instantly hurt in that moment that I couldn't even speak. I wanted to be there so FREAKING bad and to have someone else sitting in MY parents' living room saying that I talk to much when I call home was so inconsiderate. I hung up with my brother immediately and started telling Rob what happened, sobbing to the point that my words probably couldn't even be understood. He just stared at his computer screen, never once looked up at me. Then, I went to the bedroom and cried for an hour. Rob never even spoke a word to me for the rest of the night. It was like he was mad or annoyed that my feelings were hurt and I was showing emotion. What kind of husband acts that way? He is my only support system. Well, I guess I really don't even have a support system after that incident.

I'm sure all of this will blow over. As soon as I hit "PUBLISH POST", I'll get up from my chair and pick up the house. We'll go to bed angry then I'll get up in the morning, make a big, artery-clogging breakfast, and all will be well. Well, at least on the surface. One day he'll understand me but I guess today just isn't that day.

At this moment in time...

2010-06-23T21:54:00.000-07:00

I'm so in to:

Horizontal Stripes on Walls - photo from Paint Quality Institute
The idea of making my own high-end furniture - photo from Pottery Barn, plans from Knock-Off Wood
Pale gray - this might actually bump green from my favorite list. Its soft, elegant, chic, and comfortable.
Seashells - photo from Belle Maison - I have a jar of shells sitting on my new diy coffee table right now.

White floors - photo from Melificent
Aluminum side tables - photo from Four Walls and A Roof
Champagne corks - photo from Petchie's Adventures
Chevron curtains - photo from ShelterPop

New design, New Computer, and New Giveaway

2010-06-19T05:09:00.000-07:00

My design website got a new look! I've been wanting to go for a more bright and cheery interface and I finally got it done. I actually get more business when my site is subdued and simple, interestingly. So, we'll see how this works out.

Last week my computer almost gave out on me. I could feel it dying and I was terrified I would lose everything on my hard drive soon. What a koinky-dink, Rob wanted me to start playing video games again but my computer couldn't run the game. This thing was about 4 years old and run ragged. Imagine how surprised I was when Rob suggested that we just go out and get a new computer?! We really don't have the money for something like this especially since we're moving in only 4 months. But, then I had to entertain the thought of not having a computer and not being able to design. That's a loss of income - albeit small, but still income. We did have cash on hand set aside for large purchases; we were just hoping to save that for our living expenses after ETS. So, long story short, we bit the bullet and bought a new computer. Now that I'm using this new HP 20" monitor, I am amazed I was able to design at all before. My colors were so incredibly off. I actually went back to some of the blog designs I did and they look nothing like I thought they did. I am so thankful that I can see now - and I have bright, true colors on my screen!

Last bit of info, I'm sponsoring my biggest giveaway yet at tipjunkie.com!

How About A Wedding?

2010-06-18T05:58:00.000-07:00

I planned my wedding three times, bought a dress, and had a bridal shower, but I never walked down the aisle. Rob and I ended up getting married at the courthouse on a whim. Granted, we had been dating for over 4 years at the time, but we were still young and stupid. One day, I'd like to do it right and have a real wedding. I think we deserve it.

I imagine renewing our vows in the Outerbanks, NC. We went there last summer and I absolutely fell head over heels in love with that place. It has become my total inspiration for this little daydream. I think maybe Rodanthe would be the perfect spot. Something about that place just oozes romance (or maybe its just the thought of being caught in a hurricane with Richard Geere, who knows).

We'll have a very beachy theme, relaxed and comfortable. I'd like to have a picnic setup for the reception. I think its so anti-formal and just makes total sense.

I had a very fun night a couple of weeks ago planning my dream wedding. Here's some of my inspiration for this gig:

Chandelier from Boutwell Studio.
Tiki Torches from Brides.com.
Parasols from Brides.com.

Shrimp Roll from Martha Stewart.
Picnic Buffet from Nu Visions in Photography.
Steamed Clams from She Knows.
Caesar Salad from Tyler Florence.
Crab Salad on Endive from the Food Network.

Lemonade from Rebecca Thuss.
Mason Jar Cocktails from Leigh Webber Photography.
Soda Bucket from Elizabeth Anne Designs.
Starfish Place Setting from The Knot.
Blue Lemon Sorbet from The Knot.
Cucumber Sandwiches on Sea Salt Baguette from Frolic.

Guest Flip Flops from Martha Stewart Weddings.
Bouquet from Victoria Pearson.
Reception Area from Martha Stewart Weddings.
Conch from Flights of Fancy.
Starfish Escort Cards from Marie Labbancz.
Candle Seating from The Knot.

Can I call him an old geezer yet?

2010-06-17T20:05:00.000-07:00

So yesterday, June 16, was Rob's 26th birthday. I felt like an awful wife who hadn't planned a thing and didn't even have a present for him. It is very rare for me not to be prepared for a special occasion like this. Interestingly, Rob ended up having CQ duty anyhow, so he wasn't even home for a lick of the day. This gave me a little time to scheme.

During a CQ duty, you don't really sleep. He might get in a little snooze in the chair here and there if the other soldier decides to switch off with him, but this is done sitting up in a very uncomfortable plastic chair. So he was tired when he got home. Considering this little fact, he put up quite well with my shenanigans. Here's how the day went:

Rob walks through the door about 8:30 am greeted by a sea of 26 helium balloons and 26 floor balloons. This is what I get when I tell my husband to smile:

I decorated what I could in a just a couple of hours and I blew up all the balloons myself, which took way longer than expected. This banner was supposed to say "Happy Birthday Rob!" But I overestimated the size of the circles, so it ended up "Happy Bday".

And then "Rob" got put on his chair.

There was a store-bought tower of yumminess waiting for him; although, I think Ronnie enjoyed this the most out of anyone. You should have seen the powdered sugar mess!

Rob went off for a shower and Ronnie enjoyed the BALLOONS for a bit.

Time for presents! We have a hard time waiting too long when it comes to presents around here. We got him some CD-R discs (small gift but its something he's been saying he needs to buy for months and just never gets them) and three new pairs of shorts.

Next, it was breakfast time. This has got to be the most fattening breakfast ever. We don't usually eat like this, but Rob is a country boy and he likes his country food.

Rob was completely shocked when I handed him this. Its called a "manmosa". I love mimosas with breakfast on special occasions, but I've got to admit that it is a little frilly for a guy's day. That's when I found this toughened up drink from the Hoboken Guy. Mixed by the Gaslight Bar & Restaurant, this drink has Blue Moon, orange juice, and mandarin vodka. It ended up being too much alcohol for this early in the morning, so he only took a few sips but said it was good.

After breakfast, we laced up our shoes for a hike at Saunders Springs. Rob mentioned it to me a few weeks ago and I was really interested in taking the hike to see the waterfalls. Unfortunately, about 5 minutes into it, Rob's sinuses got the best of him and we decided to turn around. Between having a cold, going on no sleep, and swarming mosquitos, it just wasn't as much fun as we thought it would be. Its definitely something we'll have to try again though.

Photo from localism.com.

A little bummed out, we headed back home. Ronnie was ready to go down for a nap anyhow, so Rob and I spent some quality time gaming. lol. We played video games together for a while and then put together lunch and woke up the kid. We've really been into sandwiches lately, so I made grilled chicken breast & cheddar sammies with kettle chips and fruity pebble treats (again, terrible for you, but a nice treat). Aren't these cute little baskets I got from Wal-mart adorable!?

After lunch, we watched an episode of the X-Files and finished off our recent Biggest Looser marathon. (I so wanted Ashley to win, but Mike deserved it too.) For supper, I made Rob's favorite - Chicken & Dumplins. I'll never make it as good as his grandma, but its his all-time favorite meal. After the food we had already eaten, I was a little disgusted at the sight of a pot full of dumplins, so I opted not to photograph that moment. I did, however, photograph the cake. Yea, I feel a little guilty about using a store-bought cake and Rob made sure to rub that in a little bit. All I can say, though, was that cake was banging. It hit every single little sweet spot I had. Look at all the candles - I'm surprised the fire alarm didn't go off.

All-in-all the day was a success. I enjoyed teasing Rob about how he's getting old. It always kind of sucks when you celebrate these kinds of things so far away from your family, but we try to make the most of it. Next year, we'll have a big backyard BBQ and invite everyone!

2010-06-16T05:33:00.000-07:00

Today is my husband's 26th birthday and I have officially done nothing for him. I still don't know what I'm going to do. To make matters worse, he's got CQ duty today, which means he works 24 hours babysitting soldiers in the barracks today. Since the beginning of our time together, I have always thought of something cute and memorable to do for his birthday. I'm not sure why I'm having such a hard time this year, but I better pull it together soon!

Woah, Nelly!

2010-06-10T17:44:00.000-07:00

Stop. Breathe. Sit down. Write.

Finally! I have a moment to sit down and update my blog. Life has been crazy non-stop lately. First of all, Rob has been home all. the. time. The rest of his brigade is on block leave right now, so they are getting 4-days every weekend and get to come home after PT most days. I love my husband to death, but it definitely messes up my groove when he's home during the day.

In addition, Ronnie never sleeps anymore. I swear it was some sick joke God played on me when Ronnie was taking 3 or 4 hour naps and then going down at 7:30 every night without any problems. Now, he never wants to nap and he's staying up till 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning some nights. That's exhausting!

Really, I shouldn't be complaining. What husband gets to stay home with his family and still get paid? And I should be happy that he's choosing to spend this time with us rather than off doing his own thing. And I guess I can look at Ronnie's sleep situation like this - that's just more time I get to play with him and love on him.

Okay, moving on with more positives. Work has been BOOMING! I'm talking huge success here. So much so that I may not have to get a job when we move home after all. I'm totally expecting to have to work because the cost of living is so high there. BUT, I may be able to work from home instead. Just in the past 10 days, I have already made more than I did all last month. If the trend continues, I will have made just about what I would at a full-time job paying a little more than minimum wage, which is what I would suspect a mom who's not worked in 2 years to get. Plus, no daycare cost. No gas. No new clothes. This is the ultimate situation. Dear God, please let this work!

To amp up my client base, I am doing 5 different giveaways this month:

Basic Blogger Package at shaybocks.com
Basic Blogger Package at Love Stitched
Basic Blogger Package at All Things Beautiful
Basic Blogger Package at The Undomestic Momma
Premium Blogger Package at Tip Junkie's Birthday Bash [June 14-19]

I have so much more to get out, but I finally have some time to relax, so that's what I'm going to go do. I'll leave you with our Bocks Family Mission Statement. My goal was to take a picture of it hanging on our wall, but I just haven't done it yet, out of pure laziness. Here's what we came up with:

We, the Bocks family, believe that our purpose as a
family is to remain dedicated to one another, to
nourish and cherish each other, to be active, close,
and charitable, and to prepare for our futures and
the futures of the generations that follow us.

Our home will be a welcoming safe place to land;
a simple retreat for us and our guests.

We will accomplish our mission by:
. Living by God’s word and showing our faith through actions
. Creating new experiences to share with each other
. Consuming less resources
. Paying off our debts
. Providing learning experiences for our children
. Having the courage to not be normal
. Backing each other up always

Blog Makeover Giveaway at shaybocks.com

2010-06-03T05:34:00.000-07:00

enter to win at shaybocks.com!

Family Mission Statement: Part 1

2010-05-28T17:06:00.000-07:00

photo by David Robert Wright

Our family is about to go through a major life change. Even though military life has its challenges, we have grown accustomed to the comforts that it has allowed us. And, in fact, most of the hardships that we've faced while in the military have strengthened us and brought us closer together. Some families don't survive this change. We don't want to be one of those families, so we're thinking ahead and defining the purpose for our family through a mission statement. We're hoping that by discussing our family's mission and purpose ahead of time, we'll be able to steer clear of the issues ahead that could either make or break us.

Tonight, Rob and I sat down to discuss a few things and this is what we came up with.

Determining Our Roles

During Rob's deployment, I started seeing a counselor who helped me deal with the stress of it all. During one of our sessions, he recommended that Rob and I sit down to discuss what our roles are in the family. We never did it, so we felt like now would be an appropriate time to discuss such things. We already had a pretty good idea of what our roles are, but writing it down seemed to help organize it all and put it into perspective.

Rob:

Provide financially for our family
Security
Home maintenance
Odd jobs as needed
Trash duty
Provide learning experiences for our children
Bath time

Shay:

Create a comfortable and inviting home through cleaning, decorating, and organizing
Prepare meals
Shop for food, clothing, and other needs
Handle logistics and finances
Provide learning experiences for our children
Support Rob in everything he does or wants to do
Make events and holidays special and memorable
Contribute extra money when possible

Get the Thoughts Flowing

After we finished defining our roles, we grabbed some questions from simplemom.net's Back to Basics series to help us discuss our family's goals and pre-plan our mission statement. These answers are a combination of responses from both Rob and me.

What are a few strengths of each member of our family?

Rob is resilient, brave, and hilarious
Shay is thoughtful, organized, and supportive
Ronnie is motivating, uniting, and loving

Collectively, we are at our best when we are…

~~Souped up on coffee~~ Active; set out to accomplish something

Collectively, we are at our worst when we are…

Stressed out and idle

If we had a completely free day together as a family, how would we spend it?

trying something new: places to shop, restaurant, attractions, events, projects

What are practical ways we can serve each other?

Rob steps in to help Shay with caretaking
Shay helps Rob in preparing for his duties and contributes extra money
Ronnie fixes the computer screen when we're watching tv shows and the screen goes blank. [chuckle]

What are practical ways we can serve others outside our family?

Give to charity by donating to Goodwill & giving monetary donations to random charities
Being a kind friend

Name three things you think you could do better as a family.

Contribute to/attend a church
Do more together
Consume less resources

What would people say today about our family as a whole?

Dedicated to one another, responsible, and focused

What would we like people to say about our family as a whole in 30 years?

Financially independent, close & in-touch, still in love, charitable

If our home could be filled with one emotion, what would it be?

Love

Name three adjectives we would like people to use to describe our home environment.

Welcoming
Simple
Upscale

If we could name one principle from which we want our family to operate, what would it be?

~~Noli Me Tangere~~ "But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" - Joshua 24:15

What are the top four priorities we want our family to value?

Staying together as a family
Preparing our children to be responsible adults
Preparing for the future
Movin' on up (establishing ourselves and becoming financially independent - growing our money so we can give a lot of it away)

What is the main purpose of our home?

Shelter; a place for us to be and spend our time with each other and guests

What is the secondary purpose of our home?

A safe place to land; a relaxed environment; a retreat

What is the individual purpose in life of each member of our family?

Rob: To nourish and cherish my wife (Ephesians 5:25-30) and to bring my children up in the training and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4)
Shay: To love my husband, to love my children, to be discreet, chaste, a homemaker, good, obedient to my husband (Titus 2:4)
Ronnie: To honor his mother and father so that he may become a responsible God-loving adult (Ephesians 6:1-3)

What is one way we are unique as a family?

We're not afraid to be unconventional; we have the courage to not want to be normal

Describe the status of our family in 10 years…

financially: out of debt (except mortgage), purchased first home, kids' college saved 70%, and start planning for retirement

intellectually: Shay and Rob each should have completed a bachelor's degree
emotionally: happy, feeling secure
relationally with each other: closer, more intimate (in body, soul, and mind)
communally in our environment: more eco-friendly; established social network and support system
physically: ~~six pack~~ comfortable with our bodies
spiritually: have a church home, tithe regularly, live by God's word and show our faith through actions

Where are you as a family in 10 years? What does your home look like?

Very involved in the community through sports, school, and church functions. ~~Best character on DDO & kill at raids.~~ Our home will consist of well-defined and organized spaces. We should own our own home by then so it will be in our own custom style. Definitely more put together rather than thrown together (through repeat PCS moves).

What is the purpose of life?

Who knows?

Stay tuned for Part 2, where we put all this mumbo jumbo together to form our mission statement.

Just a quick lil update

2010-05-27T19:03:00.000-07:00

So we are 4 months and 10 days away from moving back home. I am anxious beyond belief. On one hand, I'm super thrilled that we're going to be back in our part of the world and very close to both sides of the family again. On the other hand, Virginia rent costs about double compared to where we live now. I don't know how we're going to pull this off, but in the famous words of Tim Gunn, we'll "make it work."

Right now, I'm really feeling this song. I've heard it on the radio about a million times and its so FREAKIN' catchy! The music video just doesn't do it justice, but I have to share...

The Band Perry More CMT Music More CMT Music Videos

Another awesome thing I found online is this video of a couple's first dance at their wedding. This has to be the absolute best wedding video I've ever seen because they reenacted the last scene from Dirty Dancing. Just watch in amazement:

Cute, huh?

Earlier today, Ronnie and I were driving around like mad people trying to get our errands done and make his hearing appointment on time. While en route, this song came on the radio. I had heard it before, but for some reason it hit me like a ton of bricks today. The song is about a car that an ex-soldier buys and it has a note in it from a soldier who died during war in the 60s. More specifically, he's a private. Thinking about the words, I just bawled. So many young men and women stand up to serve their country and they never come home. It makes me feel so thankful (yet guilty at the same time) that nothing happened to Rob during his 12-month tour in Afghanistan. Well, nothing deadly anyhow. All of our soldiers, dead and alive, are constantly in my prayers. Everyone should take some time to be thankful for their sacrifice - especially this weekend!

A last little tidbit to add to this totally RANDOM post is that Ronnie put himself to bed tonight - 2 hours early. Its now almost 10pm and he's still sleeping. Its so cute but at the same time I know he's going to be up way early in the morning and I won't be ready.

Hope everyone has a happy Memorial Day Weekend!

Dear Ronnie

2010-05-21T11:26:00.000-07:00

You are now 2 years, 1 month, and 14 days old. I dropped you off at "school" today - it still kills me every time I leave you. Today, we showed up as your class was taking a potty break and you had to join them sitting on the wall and waiting for each of your friends to take a turn. Seeing you sitting there was a stark reminder of how much you're growing up. As I walked all the way down that long hallway, I kept looking back at you, almost teary eyed, reminding myself that one day a week for 3 hours is good for you. You need be with other kids and have a chance to listen to other adults. You need to see how the world works.

Currently, your favorite things are bubbles, balls, Mickey Mouse, Toy Story, and your new 4-wheeler. Since its been so rainy out, I let you ride your 4-wheeler back and forth through the house. I watch you and think, "what parent lets their kid ride a power wheel in the house?" But, you're having so much fun and not hurting a thing.

You're starting to say so many words. Just today, you tried to say "blanket" and I was so proud. You're still behind in your speech, but you're progressing so fast. Four months ago you could only say one word. Now you're up to almost 100 and you're even putting words together and saying expressions. I am so proud of you.

Your eating habits are a little scary these days. Some days you like to eat a ton and other days you eat next to nothing. I can't really tell what your favorites are anymore - it changes day to day. A few things that are usually safe for you are: spaghetti, applesauce, macaroni, cheese sticks, and fruit snacks. You always want milk, which doesn't sit well with your tummy since you're lactose intolerant. We're trying to grow you out of it, so we give one or two cups a day. But when its time for juice instead, you throw the biggest fit trying to get the milk container out of the fridge while screaming "ilk! ilk!"

When you take a nap, you like to sleep for 3 or 4 hours at a time. When you don't get a nap, you have a hard time falling asleep at night and sometimes you'll wake up with a nightmare and come to our bed. I guess that comes with your age - you're growing up and processing the world around you. When its time for bed, Mama and Daddy change your diaper, fix your milk, and we all walk into your room. Sometimes, you like to turn the light off yourself, but other times, you're just too tired and go straight to bed. We lay you down, give you lots of kisses and tell you to have sweet dreams. Usually at this point, you'll take the cup out of your mouth and yell, "BYE!" Sometimes, we'll hear you playing in your room after we've already put you in bed. But, you always end up back in your bed and sound asleep before its too late. You are such a good boy.

Your best friend is Willow. She's three and we see her at play dates and other events a couple times a week. You love to give her hugs and kisses. Her mommy is a very good friend to your mommy, so I have a feeling Willow will be a life-long friend for you. Of course, you also have another best friend named Chester. He's a raccoon puppet that you LOVE to play with. Whenever you don't want to do something or when you're having a hard time obeying, Chester helps you out and gets you to listen. What a good friend.

You are so friendly. Whenever we're in a store, like Wal-mart or the Commissary, you talk to everyone you see, saying "HI!" and "BYE!" Of course, you always speak so loudly so everyone can hear you. Surprisingly, most people talk back to you and are quite friendly. Sometimes you get a little carried away, repeating "BYE!" over and over again and I have to remind you that you only have to say it one time.

I am so happy to be your Mama. God blesses me each and every day with you. Thank you for being my little boy.

Today, I heard a song on the radio that I fell in love with. The lyrics were words to live by and I want you to know this:

Be a best friend.
Tell the truth.
Over-use I love you.
Go to work.
Do your best.
Don't out-smart your common sense.
Never let your prayin' knees get lazy.
And love like crazy.

I love you with all my heart!

- Mama

Minimalist Momma

2010-05-18T19:45:00.000-07:00

images via apartment therapy and erin williamson

Almost two years ago, I stumbled upon the idea of minimalism. I started out by reading blogs like Zen Habits, Simple Mom, and Unclutterer. While I immediately fell head over heels for this way of life, I have kept the idea at a safe distance from actually making any real change in my life. I'd like to think that I'm semi-minimal. I don't like cluttered spaces. I prefer streamlined processes. I like my kitchen counters to be clear - a blank slate. On the other hand, I totally buy things I don't need just because I like them and my decorating sense is more of "what can I throw together in this room quickly because I know we're moving again in a couple of months."

I'd like to move more towards a minimalist lifestyle, which means taking the following actions:

Stop buying unnecessary things - really ask the question, "do I need this" before making a purchase.
Get rid of one thing daily - either donate, sell, or trash at least one item in my home that I haven't used in the last 6 months. I need to do this until we no longer have a need to spend $40 a month on a storage shed full of stuff.
Eat less, using fewer ingredients. Get the most out of my meals by eating mindfully. One way to accomplish this is to eat my meals out of a single bowl, using the "wash your bowl" principle. This also means less stops at McD's for a quick snack and a sweet tea on the way to the store to buy something I don't need.
Focusing on doing and enjoying experiences rather than acquiring new loot.
Slow down and enjoy contentment. I have a lot to be thankful for in my life. I want to be able to experience each moment mindfully and be totally present.

Maybe one day, I'll actually have an incredibly beautiful minimalist home. For now, I'll work on being content with what I do have.

Ronnie's 2nd Birthday Party

2010-05-12T19:07:00.000-07:00

This is a re-post from www.shaybocks.com (my portfolio site).

Last month we had Ronnie’s second birthday party. I wanted to make his party extra special, so I put in a lot of time making sure I didn’t overlook any details. Unfortunately, wind got in the way of most of our decorations. We had to nix the streamers and tablecloths at the last minute because it was so bad. I think the party still turned out well, though. I know Ronnie had a blast – and I have the pictures to prove it!
I am so in love with apothecary jars, but I never thought I’d be able to get them for the party. Everywhere I looked, they were at least $50.00 – that is, until I went to TJ Max and scored these for $6.00 a piece! I was so thrilled that I could do a candy bar for the party! We had homemade marshmallows [recipe by Prudent Baby], cotton candy, party pretzels, caramel popcorn, m&m’s, and orange candies.
We also had sack lunches for everyone. For the kids, we had organic peanut butter & jelly sammies, Snikkidy Snack cheese puffs, and raisins. For the adults, we had ham & swiss sammies, pretzels, and a pickle. I sprung for Panera bread for all the sandwiches and it was well worth it! The stickers were printed on label paper and punched out with a 2″ punch.
No sodas here. We had juice boxes for the kids and for the adults we had tea, lemonade, italian soda, and crystal light packets.
Do you notice the little plaque made by my friend, Megan? She hand painted it to match the invitations!
This mickey decoration was made with floral balls and tissue paper flowers. I followed this tutorial at We Met In A Bar for making the flowers and securing them to the balls. Then I used kebab skewers to connect the ears to the head. My original plan was to make six of these to use as centerpieces for all of the tables, but that didn’t necessarily work out. I underestimated how long it would actually take to make even one. Literally, I added the last flower just before guests arrived.
For favors, I decided to make Mousketools boxes. On the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Mickey and the gang use Mousketools that Toodles brings to them to solve problems throughout the show. I had all the kids scream “Oh, Toodles!” and gave them their boxes. Each box had mickey ears, white gloves, a puzzle, a ball, organic shark gummies, and a coloring page with crayons. The coloring page looked like this:
Although the park served as an activity in itself, I had a few extra things planned for the kids. The first was a Mickey Art craft similar to the car party craft at Jack and Izzy. Instead of a car, I cut out a Mickey shape and instead of frames (which would have cost a fortune!), I used clear photo sleeves with magnet tape attached to the back. This way the kids could put it on the refrigerator. I wish we had taken a photo of one of them, but it got missed.
The second activity was a “photo-booth”. Originally, I was going to make a booth out of a refrigerator box like I had seen somewhere online, but I later decided that it was easier and more practical just to put up a piece of fun fabric for the kids to stand in front of. It worked out better, I think, because the lighting wasn’t restricted and my photographer was able to get some great shots! We put out some hats, party glasses, and a feather boa for everyone to use, but I think this photo of Gracie in her Mickey ears is just priceless. Unfortunately, by this point Ronnie had lost interest in the party and went to play on the park, so we didn’t get any of him.
In researching for the party, I found that there isn’t much out there for a Mickey theme that doesn’t use the licensed junk they sell at party stores. For this reason, I’m sharing some of the printables I created so that anyone can use them. Because things will need to be personalized, you’ll need Photoshop and a working knowledge of how to edit .psd files. You’ll also need the following fonts that I used:
SF Slaptstick Comic
Cartwheel
Mickey Ears
TW Cen Mt Condensed
Fenway Park JF
Click on thumbnails to download PSD & PDF files:

“Thanks for Coming” Coloring Page

Cupcake Toppers

Mousketools Labels

Water Bottle Labels

Don’t have Photoshop or would like a customized party package for your next party? Email me at shay@dumplindesignstudio.com! I’m hoping to have a package available soon for purchase, but until then, just let me know what you need and we can work something out.

I’ll leave you with a few photos of us at the party to show off how happy Ronnie was!

Mother's Day Brunch with the girls

2010-05-12T19:01:00.000-07:00

My word - how this week has flown by! Its already Wednesday night and I'm just getting around to posting about Sunday.

Sunday was Mother's Day and, boy, was it fabulous! Since the guys were out in the field doing training exercises (got to love the army for taking them away for EVERY holiday), we met up and had brunch. Megan made fabulous pancakes with every imaginable topping and yummy omelets customized to each person. Aimee brought the booze for mimosa's - a drink we only enjoy once a year. And I provided the decor.

I was able to do place settings for everyone - 4 moms and 9 kids! The moms got personalized water bottles, place card asparagus ferns with personalized flags, and these adorable cheese favors - I totally snagged this idea from Twig & Thistle.

The kids all got their own snazzy setting as well. To cut down on dishes, we went for paper. I found these adorable cookies at Wal-mart, of all places, so I used them as place cards for the kids. I just stuck them in candy bags and topped them off with personalized labels. They also got Mother's Day water bottles, and of course, I had to go with crazy straws.

I think Mother's Day celebrations are generally pink, but I decided to go with a totally different color scheme, since we all love the color green. I ended up with a soft green, teal blue, and a peachy orange.

After the food festivities ended, the kids painted flower pots for each of the moms and planted poppy seeds in them. I think they turned out amazing!

In addition, Megan had a little trick up her sleeve. She gave all the kids picture mats to color for their moms. Then, she took each set of moms and kids out to a shady area to snap some photos - she's a great photographer! Here's the end result (Ronnie's is so lightly colored that you can't tell anything is there, but trust me, its got some adorable scribbles on it):

All-in-all, I'd say the day was a smashing success! I'm so glad I got to have yet another Mother's Day brunch with my girlfriends - 2 years in a row. What in the world are we going to do next year when we're all spread across the country??